Heartbeat (Lauren Jauregui)

Chapter 13

Lauren's POV

I arrived at school earlier to mark the worksheets I had received back from the class the previous day. This is the one part of being a teacher that I don't enjoy, marking the students' work. I love teaching them, well most of them. I have no idea what I did so wrong to Olivia to make her feel so angry with me. I know what I said in front of her mum was bad, but I didn't realise she hadn't come out yet. After seeing her and Ashley kiss in the bathroom I assumed everyone knew about her sexuality, including her parents.

Watching her mum react like that towards her daughter broke my heart. Olivia looked petrified and quickly denied what I had said about her. It brought on some bad flashbacks with what happened with my father. Although we have passed that, he is happy for me and supports my decisions and the way I want to live my life. I just hope her mum can be the same. Although she has acted horrible towards me, I completely understood why when I watched her mother beat her down with her words making her feel so small and helpless. Nobody deserves to feel helpless.

I knew she hated me so I thought I better keep to my word and try to talk Principal Smith into allowing her to transfer into another class although he wasn't budging stating that she will come around to me eventually and that change can be hard for some people. I wasn't happy with that decision but no matter what I stated to argue my point he wasn't going to change his mind. I know that I will have to deliver this disappointing news to Olivia, and I knew she wasn't going to be happy about it.

A knock on the door brought me out of my thoughts and I quickly stood up making papers fly onto the floor. I groaned quietly and left them there whilst walking towards the entrance of my classroom. I opened the door and saw Olivia standing there and the smile instantly dropped from my face. I knew I had to tell her the bad news, but I wasn't expecting her to want it this morning. Her face was unreadable, but her actions showed that she was nervous. I realised I was staring at her, watching her moves.

"I couldn't convince Principal Smith to transfer you out of my class." I said breaking the silence. She nodded at my words but asked if we could talk. I nodded in response and motioned for her to follow me before shutting the door to give us a bit more privacy.

"Miss. Jauregui, I'm really sorry for everything I said and did to you. You were right, you didn't deserve it. Everything I did was pathetic and wrong. I have no excuses for what I did. Again, I'm really sorry." She said. Although she said she doesn't have an excuse for what she did, I believe she did. I knew her reasons, even if she didn't know it yet. I placed my hand on her arm to comfort her, it was really brave of her to apologise to me.

"I forgive you Olivia. I know what you are going through is rough and I understand." I said, she looked confused making me smile at her. The words my father yelled at me when he caught me with a woman replayed in my mind. I led her to my desk before explaining myself and why I knew how she felt. She said nothing at first almost like she was thinking about my words.

"Why are you being so kind to me Miss. Jauregui? I was horrible to you." She said as she looked down at her hands.

"You remind me of myself," I said. She looked up at me, I could see she wanted to ask a question.

"So, you are gay?" She asked, making me chuckle and a smile appeared on her face. Her smile was beautiful. I told her what you could consider my label to be and she accepted it but what she said next broke my heart.

"You should never feel disgusted with who you love." I told her. I knew it wasn't an easy task, it will never be easy to accept yourself when the one person who is meant to love you more than anything can't. She stood up and thanked me for the talk. This talk made me see her in a completely different light. I liked the person she portrayed today, this was the real Olivia.

"I just hope to see you in my class today Olivia" I said, she grinned at me and nodded making me happy. I can't wait to see her again. Although we will be surrounded by everyone else, at least I could hear her laugh whilst she chats with her friends, I can see her smile. I can look into her beautiful eyes once more before the weekend.

This week has been very eventful between the two of us. I just hope she has a good day today.

I went back to my work, picking up the sheets that had fallen to the floor. The last bell rang, but luckily, I didn't have a class in the morning so I could finish the work. After I knew all the students would be in class, I thought I should go for a walk around the halls to stretch my legs.

As I turned the corner a person ran into me. The impact shocked me, and I looked down and saw Olivia. Tears were rolling down her perfect face. The sight broke my heart even more. She doesn't deserve to feel this much pain. I watched her quickly wipe the tears from her face almost like she didn't want me to see them. She didn't want me to know the true pain she was feeling.

"Olivia. What happened?" I was very concerned for the innocent girl. Her lip began to tremble, and tears started to roll down her delicate cheeks again. She got up and looked behind me, I knew she wanted to leave. I couldn't blame her; this place has caused her so much trouble this week.

"Come with me." I said and held my hand out for her to grab it. She slipped her soft hands into mine. My heart started to beat faster with the contact. I walked her to my classroom and allowed her to walk in. The sadness on her face made me want to protect her. I instinctively wrapped my arms around the smaller girl and placed my hand on the back of her head. I told her to just let it out.

Although seeing Olivia cry made me want to cry, I knew she needed to let it out. She needed to be held and comforted. She just needed someone to be with her, to support her. She needs someone who understands, and I understand. I started to sway slightly and hummed a song gently hoping this will allow her to calm down enough to tell me what happened.

After about 10 minutes I could hear her cries soften and she pulled away from me slightly. I let her go and walked to my desk to grab her a tissue. She wiped her face and quickly started to apologise for making my shirt wet. Her consideration made me feel happy but also sad. She should not be apologising, especially for crying.

"It's okay. It will dry. Do you want to talk about what happened?" I asked her. She bit her lip and shook her head.

"Are you sure? I'm always here if you need me." I said. She smiled and asked if she could go as she didn't want to be late for her next class. I just nodded and allowed her to leave my class. Although I really didn't want to. I wanted to keep her here, I wanted to wrap her up in my arms and protect from anyone whose desire was to harm her.