Heartbeat (Lauren Jauregui)

Chapter 32

Olivia's POV

I was laying in bed, the thoughts of my mother driving me absolutely insane. I wasn't sure whether that was the last time I would ever see my mum. I didn't know whether my dad was going to be okay. I wasn't sure whether I was truly ever going to be happy again, especially if my mum has left my life completely. I need my family. My phone pinged alerting me of a new message scaring me slightly. I groaned and reached over towards it although it was probably just Normani.

Lauren: Hey, I don't know if you are still awake, but I wanted to know if you were free this Friday night?

I smiled slightly at her message; I was just about to respond when she sent another.

Lauren: If you aren't free don't feel obligated to cancel your plans. I can pick another day.

My smile grew a little, she was cute. I knew that I was completely free Friday, but I wasn't sure whether I was truly up for it at the moment. I didn't want to spoil our first date purely because of my grave mood. Although, maybe spending time with Lauren would be good, it would make me happy even if it's just for a few hours.

Olivia: Hey Lauren, I am free Friday. What time were you thinking?

Lauren: I can pick you up at 6?

Olivia: Sounds great, although do you think it is a good idea you picking me up? What if someone sees?

Lauren: Good point. Meet me at the park near your house?

Olivia: Yeah, that would be better.

Lauren: Perfect, I will put you up at 6 at the park.

Lauren: How are you feeling? Please don't lie to me, you need to remember I am always here for you.

I sighed at her message. I hoped she wouldn't ask me how I am. I already knew that I wouldn't be able to hide my emotions from her tomorrow at school. No matter how hard I try, I always fail and end up crying to her. It is crazy. I used to be so in control of myself and my emotions, I would never cry in front of anyone, not even my best friends or parents and now I was literally sitting in my teacher's lap crying to her. What is Lauren doing to me? I bit my lip and thought of a way that I could actually express how I felt right now. I might as well be honest with her; I am so sick of lying.

Olivia: Truthfully, I feel horrible. Ashley sent my parents a picture of the two of us.

I sent the first message and began typing another. I unfortunately am the type of person that would rather send 10 messages rather than just one long one. I am sure that annoys an awful lot of people, but I can't stop myself, call it another bad habit.

Almost immediately after I sent the message my phone began ringing. Lauren decided to call me. I groaned in response. Who wants to call nowadays? I knew hearing her voice would only make me cry, but I couldn't ignore her. I pressed the green button and put the phone to my ear.

"Liv? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Did your parents hurt you? What happened?" Lauren started throwing a million and one questions my way.

"Lauren, I will be okay." I muttered. I heard her sigh before a bit of commotion happened.

"I don't care if I get caught, I am coming to pick you up. We are going to go on a little drive, and you can talk to me about what happened. And before you argue I want to be there for you." She said and hung up before I could get a word in. I sighed and stood up, the least I could do was make myself a little bit more presentable. I didn't need Lauren to regret asking me on a date.

After brushing my hair and straightening my clothes out, I made my way downstairs. I need an excuse to tell my dad as I couldn't just leave, not after what happened.

"Dad?" I called out. I heard him answer from the kitchen. As I walked in my dad was sitting there leaning against the counter with his head in his hands. He quickly looked up and put a fake smile on his face although I could already tell he had been crying.

"I'm going out, just meeting a friend." I said. He nodded but didn't say anything else.

"It will be okay Dad; she will be back." I said. He only nodded again. I quickly walked over to him and wrapped my arms around him giving him a tight squeeze, hoping to provide him a bit of comfort. I really didn't like seeing my dad so upset. He is always so happy and to know that this has made him cry only wanted to make me cry.

"I'm going to go now." I mumbled, pulling away he told me to be safe and I rushed out just in time for Lauren to pull up. I quickly climbed into her car and she waited until I put my seatbelt on before driving away.

"Tell me what happened?" She said, she reached over and took my hand in hers interlocking our fingers.

"My mum tried to kick me out, but my dad stopped her. He knew I was gay before today and told me he accepted me for who I am." I started. She nodded but kept her eyes on the road. Her thumb gently rubbed the top of my hand trying to comfort me. I thought about what to tell her next, it was all a bit of a blur at the moment.

"Liv, it's okay. Just tell me what you can." She said. I nodded before continuing.

"After my dad stopped her, they got into a heated argument and that's when I admitted to them that I was gay. Although, I think I told her that I didn't want to be gay and she told me that she can put me into therapy to help me." Lauren cut me off with a scoff before quickly apologising and telling me to continue. I giggled lightly at her response.

"I believe I then admitted to my previous relationship with Ashley. My mum was in shock and then she apologised. I don't really understand it all Lauren. She apologised and told me she needed to fix herself and that she was going to leave. She packed a bag and left. What if she doesn't come back? If she doesn't come back, then it is all my fault. I drove my mum away because of my selfish ways. I love her so much, she's my mum. I can't lose her, not because of this." I was cut off by my own sob. I couldn't keep talking about this. Lauren quickly pulled into a parking lot and stopped her car. She removed her seat belt before removing mine and gently pulled me into her lap.

"Just let it all out. I'm here." She told me. I rested my head gently against her chest and clung to her lightly. She rubbed my back and every so often she would place a gentle kiss on my forehead.

I don't know how long Lauren and I stayed like that, but I needed it. I needed her. She would occasionally tell me that I was going to be okay and that it wasn't my fault.

"It's quite late now. I should probably get you back home. I don't want your father to worry about you." She said. I looked at the clock in her car and gasped slightly. It was now quarter to midnight. I'm pretty sure she picked me up at 5.

"I'm so sorry Lauren. I'm sure this isn't how you wanted to spend your evening."

"Liv don't worry baby. All that matters is that you are feeling a bit better." She responded. I looked up at her. She looked down and smiled at me. I instantly smiled back.

"Honestly, I feel much better. Thank you." I responded. The smile on her face only grew.

"I am so glad to hear that."

I sat up a little and placed my hand gently on her cheek, "I really mean it Lauren. Thank you." She leant it and placed a soft kiss on my lips, she lingered there for a few seconds before pulling away and helping me back into my seat.

"Let's get you home." She spoke in a quiet soft voice.