WISH TO BE YOURS| Valerio Montesinos

12. Behind the glass door

⌘

Once the voices and the screams stopped I looked towards my balcony door. It was almost an hour that I could hear my dad- well Valerio's dad screaming at him. Not even once did I hear Valerio say something back at him. When it stopped I heard the door close with a very loud noise. I slowly got up and realised I was sitting the whole hour on my bed without moving an inch. 

I slowly walked outside on the balcony and then to Valerio's balcony door. It was dark outside and my eyes hurt from all the crying. I didn't even want to know how I looked right now; hair a complete mess, marcara all messed up from the crying and eyes red and puffy. 

I looked inside his room and saw him sitting on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands. This all situation really broke my heart. And most of all it hurt me that I had to lie again. I had to lie to him. But I had no choice, let's be realistic. Our relationship, if I could call it that, was doomed before it even started.

I slowly brought my shaking hand and knocked slightly at the glass door. His head immediately snapped towards me and our eyes locked. As he slowly got up and walked towards the door I noticed his eyes were extremely red and his one cheekbone was almost bruised. I closed my eyes and tried to hold back the tears. He opened the door and let me step inside and I walked further inside the room as he closed the door. 

Our moves were very slowly and we both looked hurt and awful. I looked up at him as he slowly took some steps and came in front of me. ''Valerio...'' I breathed out and he then, with a quick move, wrapped his hands around me and brought his head on the crook of my neck. He started crying as he held me tightly. I was almost frozen for this action. I had never seen him break down like this.

I slowly pushed him away and looked up at him. He looked down at me and even though he looked hurt and a mess I really thought he was beautiful. ''What did he do?'' I asked and touched his cheekbone with my finger. He twisted at my move and I pulled my hand away.

''I don't know what happend, I could easily have stopped him, I just couldn't.'' he said, his voice low and breaking slightly. I wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing him down in my embrace. As I had my head on his shoulder I slightly closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

''I'm sorry.'' I breathed out and broke the hug. He looked at me confused.

''Por qué? It's not your falt.'' he said and I took another deep breath.

''Leave, Valerio.'' I said and he stared at me more confused.

''What?'' he breathed out.

''Leave, go to your mom. It would be best for all of us.'' I told him, avoiding his eyes. He on the other hand searched mine.

''What are you talking about, Savvy?'' he breathed out again and outstreched his hand to lift my head but I took a step back. He stared at me and his look changed.

''You have to go. Go and never come back.'' I said and finally looked at him inside his eyes. I tried to look as emotionless as I could. His look held a confusion and his eyes looked hurt.

''What did she tell you?'' he asked and I looked away. He took a step forward and his voice became louder. ''Please tell me what she told you, did she threatened you? Please Savvy. Whatever she told you we can fix it. Together.'' he said and placed his hands on my cheeks. I stared at him for a second and then pulled his hands away from my face.

''There's no we. They didn't tell me anything. I don't want you here, Valerio. I'm just giving you a last chance.'' I said and my heart broke inside me.

''A last chance to do what?'' he asked and I noticed his voice became even lower which meant he was starting to angry. 

''A chance to leave before I confirm to dad that what he thinks is right.'' I said and his eyes darkened as he took a step back.

''Your going to tell him I used you? Just an hour ago you were trying to say the truth? What changed?'' he spat disgusted. I took a short breath and tried to look unbotheres.

''I got out of the bubble.'' I told him and he let out a sigh before turning around and placing his hand in his hair.

''Wow.'' he breathed out. ''And here I thought you were diferent.'' he said and I closed my eyes for a second. ''But who was I kidding? Your the same selfish bitch like all of them.'' he said and turned around. ''We had something. And you said so yourself that you loved me. But when you got in a pushy condition you quited. You sold me out. And because of what? Because I'm your fucking half brother?'' he said, his voice raising.

''Or beacuse your a fucking junkie!'' I snapped back and his face softened as a tear rolled down his cheek.

''I love you, Savvy.'' he said and stared inside my eyes. I couldn't handle it anymore so I looked away from his eyes.

''Lo siento, Valerio.'' I said and walked passed him, towards the balcony door.

''Just be sure of one thing only.'' he said making me stop walking but I didn't turn around. ''When you change your mind, which I know you will, I won't be there. '' he said and I closed my eyes while a single tear rolled down my cheek.

''Just know that whatever I told you when we were together was true.'' I said and opened the door.  When it closed behind me, I stood there taking a big breath of fresh air. I slowly turned around and saw he stood behind the glass door looking at me. I stared back at him and pierced his eyes with mine.

I knew that this was the last time I was seeing him so I looked at him and wished he could read the look from my eyes. So much of a goodbye. I couldn't have even that. I wish he could understand that all this was a lie. I wish he could see from my look that I loved him. But I guess he didn't when he closed the curtains. More tears fell from my eyes as I slowly returned to my room.

Inside was my mom leaning against my door. When I walked inside I threw her a look and closed the balcony door behind me. ''Is it done?'' she asked and I sighed before taking off my shoes. 

''Yes.'' I said without looking at her not even once.

''I'm proud of you, cariño.'' she said and I closed my eyes as the anger build up inside me.

''You can be sure that you're not my mother anymore.'' I said firmly.

''It's for everyone's shake.'' she said and I let out a sarcastic chuckle.

''It's only for your shake.'' I said and looked at her dead in the eyes. ''I wish you realise your mistake seconds before you die when you won't be able to apologise. Have fun in hell.'' I said with a smirk. I could see she was taken aback by my words but she straightened her skirt and walked out of my room.

When she was out I pulled out the drawer of my night stand and picked up a bottle rum. I don't even remember how it appeared there, maybe from when Lu and I used to have sleepovers. I took off my clothes and changed into my pj's before falling on my bed and opening the bottle.

⌘