METANOIA | TK

Chapter Ten

Hi! I made a playlist for metanoia. I'll leave it on my profile.

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Jeongguk manages to get past Seokjin with ease, the older just glancing at him and Taehyung when they walk through. He knows he'll have a lot of explaining to do and that his phone will be immediately spammed with messages and calls from all of his friends so he decides to close it for the night, focusing on the way Taehyung's face beams as he stares at the sky above them through the glass windows. It's warm in there so Jeongguk takes his coat off, hanging it on the chair before starting to unpack the meals he's bought, more for Taehyung since he wasn't even feeling hungry.

"Don't they also have a restaurant here?" Taehyung asks when he sits at one of the tables, Jeongguk looking down at him as he sets the dishes on his side.

"They're not working past eight and it's almost ten now. I figured you'd be hungry so I got a lot of things since I don't know what you like."

When they meet eyes, Taehyung is smiling, not his usual goofy smile, but a soft, almost sad looking, one taking over his features. He stares at the food like it's the best thing he's been given and Jeongguk realizes he must be feeling touched. It's new to him as well since he's never even properly went on such a date before, if you could even call it that.

"Is this too much for a second date?" He jokingly asks, but he's sure Taehyung hears the uneasiness in his voice because he starts laughing.

"No, Jeongguk, it's, really, it's the best dinner I've had and it hasn't even started. You thought about me and what I enjoy and you've managed to do something so amazing even if we've known each other for only a couple of weeks. You're amazing, Jeongguk, thank you."

He smiles after hearing his words, sitting down and unpacking the chopsticks as well, offering a set to Taehyung. The other still has that sad look on his face, rather melancholic, and Jeongguk would like to ask him about it, to let him know that he's there to listen. He doesn't, opening up the bottle of wine instead, trying to make it look classier than it does since he's kind of struggling. However, him fighting with the bottle's cap makes Taehyung laugh so he thinks the embarrassment is worth it.

"You even bought more wine after I started drunk confessing my emotional theories to you last time." Taehyung mumbles, smiling softly, almost seeming embarrassed as they both remember the previous night they spent together.

Jeongguk doesn't think the other has any reasons to feel embarrassed since his drunken state was just as interesting and fascinating as his normal self but he doesn't voice his thoughts

"So, tell me about yourself, Jeongguk. Do you like art? We met in an art gallery more than once so I suppose you do." The other says, his chopsticks picking up a slice of meat afterwards.

Jeongguk looks up from the paper cup he's holding, blinking towards Taehyung as he tries to avoid spilling any of the red wine on his clothes.

"I do but I don't visit museums as much as I'd like to. I also don't have any artworks at home but I am the owner of some great ones."

Taehyung takes the cup he's handed, smiling when their hands touch, and Jeongguk has to remind himself that they've met for a couple of times and never properly touched each other. He thinks it's nice, the reassurance that they don't need to, that the attraction between them isn't merely a physical one. They don't always talk a lot but Jeongguk finds the comfortable silence between them better than any long conversation he could ever have. It feels like they don't need to voice themselves in order to understand each other.

"So you don't have them at home? Do you have them in your office?" Taehyung asks, visibly confused, and Jeongguk shakes his head.

"I bought them but I sent them back to the artists. This might seem like a rude act but I think artworks are personal treasures, something very dear to their creators, and, if I put myself in their shoes, I wouldn't want my greatest treasures to be taken away from me. I get that they need money and I'm more than capable to provide for those that catch my eye but, at the same time, I still want them to own what they created themselves. No one can actually understand a painting besides the painter himself because parts of their souls are put into it so I wouldn't want to intrude and claim that I get it when, in fact, I don't."

When he stops talking he can hear the buzzing sound of the music playing in the background, Taehyung's breathing merging with it as he looks at him with the saddest look Jeongguk's seen on him. It's the same look he had when they met in the gallery and, even if Jeongguk didn't see it as well then, he can understand that it carries the same feelings. He wants to ask Taehyung what's wrong but the boy changes his expression into a smiling one, every sign of sadness disappearing like it's never even been there. Jeongguk thinks that making yourself look instantly happy after looking so sad must need a lot of practice and he can't help but wonder how many times Taehyung's been forced to fake his smile before.

"You're really something, Jeongguk. I'm really glad I got to meet you and hear you say those words." He says after a few seconds, closing his eyes and smiling at the end, an image Jeongguk would like to capture in a photograph because it's pure, genuine.

"I'm also glad we met, Taehyung, and I hope we'll meet each other even more in the future."

He doesn't know why but, after hearing his words, Taehyung's eyes sadden ever more, the other not talking that much during the rest of their dinner.

After they're both done, Jeongguk gets up, motioning for Taehyung to follow, both of them walking to the center of the room they're in, a staircase nicely designed leading them to a higher part of the tower, where they can sit on a bench in order to watch the sky.

"I could stay here and watch the stars all day to be honest. I'd bring my telescope too and I'd play some slow music on the background." Taehyung mumbles, his head thrown back as he leans on his hands, Jeongguk turning to stare at him for a few seconds before he copies his relaxed stance, the pressure in his shoulders disappearing.

"I guess I'd play Fall Out Boy really loud and just vibe with them."

Taehyung laughs at that, sighing in the end. "You are what you love, not who loves you, right? I loved that song a while back, it reminded me that we're our own persons and nothing else can define us besides our passions and our minds."

Jeongguk is looking at him but Taehyung is still staring at the sky, a soft smile covering his face, like he's having a good time watching it, but the spark in his eyes isn't there anymore. He realizes then that Taehyung could be more than he lets people see, more than just the happy smiles he shows and he can't help but want to unravel every part of him. That, if he'll be allowed to and, from the way Taehyung is looking at the sky, Jeongguk thinks it will take a while.

Their knees are touching and he can hear Taehyung's soft breath but, somehow, the distance between them still feels like miles that need to be walked during a storm.

Jeongguk's always loved storms so he ends up smiling as he settles his hand on the bench, right next to Taehyung's.

"You're more than that, Taehyung. More than anything someone could ever imagine. You're like a blue star among red ones, having the ability to shine so bright but still hiding yourself away."

When he turns towards the other, Taehyung is already watching him with a serious face. They look into each other's eyes for a few seconds, a moment that could overtake every physical contact he's ever had with someone, because this mere action, the raw emoting Taehyung is letting him see in his hazel irises, is worth so much more.

Taehyung is the first one to turn back towards the sky, this time smiling, and the warmth of his hand as it settles over his is enough to assure Jeongguk that the path towards his secrets, towards his feelings, might open up, slowly, but surely, someday.