Dancing For Love

23. I hate that I love you

That very moment, Gulf gave up. He was sitting on the kitchen floor with knees to his chest and head lying on his knees. He was heart broken. All the happy memories with Mew now made him sad. After a while, he finally got up to drink some water. He hated his fridge right now. He took a bottle of water but then saw something down. One of the football shaped magnet fell off from the fridge. He bend to take it and put the magnet on the fridge but it fell down again. As he was picking the magnet, he saw a piece of random paper below the fridge and picked it up. He looked at the magnet looks like you lost your magnetism just like I lost P'Mew. 

He sighed and put the magnet on the counter. He was about to throw the paper in the dustbin but as he was about to crumple it and he was shocked. There was something written on the back side of it. He started reading it 'My dear Nong, I'm sorry I had to leave. At first I thought I'll just write it on a sticky note that I'm sorry I can't be next to you when you wake up but my hand writing is too big, it didn't fit so I'm writing it here on this paper and I feel I need to write a long one as I know  you will think that I ran away from you or ended things with you but I promise you it's not. I'm not leaving you, but I just need some time. Please don't hate me na. I promise I'll call you soon or text you. I just need to think about things but none of them are about if we should be together or not. I told you yesterday I'm not stupid enough to let you go so don't think that my kitten. I want to be with you but just give me some time. I'll call you very soon. Yours and only yours, Mew.' 

Gulf fell on his knees on the floor and held his heart oh my fvking fragile heart. damn it Mew!! you scared me to death urrghhh I hate you so much But he smiled You could have just woken me up and said that. Then he thought about it yeah no I wouldn't have let you go. I'd pull a whole tantrum. urghh I hate that you know me so well!! He read the letter again and then again. 'Yours and only yours' hmm sounds nice he chucked and blushed 

"ugh what a waste of tears Ai magnet! why did you have to fall huh? Almost cried to death here and even gave up!! uii my breakfast! damn it Gulf, why do you have to be so dramatic!" Gulf talked to himself and then cleaned the kitchen. He went to his bedroom. He opened his closet and took out a picture from the drawer. It was the Polaroid picture from their time in amusement park, he framed it. He sat on the bed and smiled 

"Phi, you better call or text me soon! You said very soon, so it means you probably need a day to think. what are you thinking about? ugh fine I can give you time. It's still better than thinking you ran away. ugh the things you make me feel in such a small span of time!" He put the frame close to his chest "I swear you will be the death of me. Just come back to me soon!" 

Day 1 went by but for Gulf it felt like ages. He ended up watching movies all day. He checked his phone way too many times but Mew didn't call yet. By night time he was twisting and turning but couldn't sleep. urghh am I so used to sleeping next to you? this is ridiculous! 

"One sheep, two sheep, three sheep, four sheep, five sheep,..." he counted till 30 "damn it!! can I just fall asleep already so I don't have to miss him!" He tried hard but still couldn't sleep. 

He got up and went to his table. "Let me do some light reading" He picked up a Novel and smiled. He started reading it. The novel was 'The Notebook'. As he was reading, his eyes fell on his diary. He kept the novel away and opened his diary and took out the letter he wrote 3 years ago after he decided to move on from Mew because he was in a relationship. He opened the letter. 

'P'Mew, 

      So I looked up on google about how to move on from people and one of the sites said to write a letter about the things you feel and would want to tell them. So I'm writing this, it's not like you're ever gonna read this so I can actually write things I would never get the chance to tell.