Chapter 18: underneath

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There is so much happening

and I wish I could control it

but I've never  been able to and most likely never will be 

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Jungkook P.O.V

''Man, if you won't call her, I will,'' Jimin teases.

''Ya! Don't try to steal my girl like that,'' I whine softly.

''Your girl, I see,'' He says, adding pressure on the 'your'.

I blush. 

I've always been quite possessive over the things I find valuable in my life. She's worth way more than I am willing to admit.

''So when do I call? You know before it gets awkward and stuff,'' I wonder scratching my neck.

''How about tonight? Around 9?'' He suggests.

''Wait, so A.M or P.M-,'' I cut myself off and smile shyly.

''Dumb question?'' He chuckles

''Yeah,''

A very harsh shoulder bumps into mine, causing my books to fall out of my hands.

''Watch where you're going, you twat,'' 

A rich smell fills in my personal space. What a strong perfume.

Or it could just be my senses acting up because I feel a little unbalanced

''Hey, don't mind it. I'll help you out,'' Jimin says holding my hand to see if I'm okay. 

Am I okay?

No.

W-why?

Why am I not okay?

It's happening again.

Just like that night of the dance. Same symptoms.

I feel like I'm going crazy. Without a warning, I run towards the restroom.

 Without a warning, I run towards the restroom

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Everything around me slowly starts to whiten. 

But-

He follows me. He always does. That's why people like Jimin so much.

He always cares. Always.

''Jungkookie, com on, breathe,'' 

I hold on to his grip on me and slowly start to inhale.

And exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

''I'm okay, I'm okay,'' I whisper slowly.

''W-what just happened?'' He asks me.

His voice is very broken.

Yet again, I have succeeded to make someone whom I care about cry, again.

''Was it a panic attack?'' 

I don't respond. I don't know what it was.

''Hyung, let's go,'' He whispers.

''Class?'' I ask, kind of anxious to go to class. 

''No, Home,'' 

''B-but,''

''No but, we'll talk about this. You're going to tell me everything I need to know, okay?''

''Everything?''

''Everything,'''

''You might never want to be friends with me, ever again,'' 

''Jungkookie, I will always want to be friends with you,''

''So, what will make you comfortable? My house or yours-''

''Yours,'' I cut him off. 

I don't really have a home.

''Okay,'' He smiles softly.

.............................................................................................................

''So tell me,'' 

I don't want to lose him, but I feel like not telling him will make me lose him even more.

''I,''

''You?''

''I'm a m-monster,''

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