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Pacing back and forth, i tried to call Taehyung for the nth time. I should have explained everything. After that incident, it took me a whole night to register everything in my system and came to a conclusion that whatever the past is, it should be left in the past.
On the otherhand, i need to talk to my ex, or should i say, soon to be ex because after what he did Though i know for sure that he still has a great impact in my heart, i would never want to go back again. Not in this lifetime.
I hope so.
He did it to his self. But i had to explain first to Taehyung and ask to give me sometime to settle my past. I have to be truthful. I should have told him about it before letting him enter my life but him entering my life wasn't something i anticipated. It also came in a rush that i didn't even know i could love again.
"Taehyung please." pleading for his answer, im too torn enough to think that he'd probably leave me because of what happened. After another unsuccessful attempt, i sat on the edge of my bed and silently cried. Maybe because of too much emotions, those cries turn into heavy bawling. It didn't take long before my members notice the loud noise in my room from sobbing and panting, they immediately rush to my bed worriedly.
"Chaeyounga, what happened?" Jisoo ask rubbing my back as she tries to embrace me. Jennie who's already on her deep sleep when she heard it run outside and returned with a glass of water. "Rosie, please. Tell us what happened." she ask holding my hand gesturing the water she luts on the bedside table but i shake my head, words lost as i continue to cry. While Lisa didn't say a word but just hugs me tight looking at me worriedly.
"Okay, if it's hard enough, you don't have to talk. Just let everything go first. Cry it out and when your okay, we will listen." Jisoo sad which i nodded and cried some more. After a few minutes of sobbing while they all comfort me silently, the sobs shallowed and and getting all the courage, i look at the three girls who have been nothing but the best sisters i have. All through out our training days up till now, they've been always there and by telling what i feel, i know they could give me some advice.
"H-he's back." i started fidgeting and stuttering.
With curious eyes, they look at me confused. "Who?" Jennie asked followed by the two with the same exact question.
It was hard to say the name of the person I shared my first at everything and was expecting to be my last. I do have some fair share of boyfriends but I never opened up the way I opened myself to this guy. As a church girl, I'm always that reserved person. But those reservations ended when I met him.
Someone whom just looking at his adorable smile, bright and cheerful eyes, those eyes that forms like a crescent moon whenever he smiles and laughs- you can never say no. He was like the perfect boyfriend. Gentle, loving, kind, always makes me laugh, always tends to my needs, the person who always listen to whatever things i say may it be relevant or useless. He was my everything, until it lasted...... PAINFULLY.
