And i'll use you as a makeshift gauge
Of how much to give and
how much to take
-"Ok Yoongi. I need you to keep calm ok? If you ever feel like you're going to get into another attack, tap your thighs 3 times." Seokjin instructed.
Yoongi only nods, as he adjust himself on the couch where he is currently laying.
They were at Seokjin's office and is now starting therapy since he decided to heed Jimin's words and go with the doctor.
All he can see is a blank ceiling, and he's been staring it for he doesn't know how long.
"Let's start with the basics," Seokjin started.
"Min Yoongi, age 26. Hometown is Daegu and is now currently living in Seoul. A Fine Arts student before he became a painter - and no relatives are stated." He reads out loud from the clipboard that he was holding.
Yoongi nods for clarification and took some deep breathes. He knows how this therapy will goes. After Seokjin will say his information, he will then go and -
"Widow. Husband has been deceased since -"
Yoongi violently taps his thighs multiple times as his chest suddenly goes up and down. The painter choke and gasps as he chases his breath, which he seems to be running out of.
The doctor didn't panic. Instead, he helps Yoongi sits up and rubs his back in a soothing and comforting manner, as he whispers instructions in Yoongi's ear.
"Breathe. Calm down. Breathe."
Yoongi tried doing what he was told. His lips are parted as he took several deep and long breaths. There were now tears cascading down on his cheeks, and whimpers has suddenly escapes from his pink lips.
This is one of the things Yoongi hates.
He feels weak, fragile, and vulnerable.
Part of why he doesn't want to continue therapies anymore.
Everytime he would come here, Seokjin will remind him of what happened - of a past that he wants to be erased.
He knows Seokjin only does that to make him overcome his trauma, but what's the point of it if everytime he mentions the word 'husband', memories will come crashing down at him like a big tidal wave?
Drowning him again and again.
"Remember what i told you. Think about the things that makes you happy."
Yoongi tries to think - if he can actually think straight, of all the things that makes him happy.
What are those things actually?
Has he really been happy?
Since when was the last time he felt happy?
Yoongi closed his eyes as he continues to breathe heavily, with Seokjin still rubbing his back in a circular motion.
"Tell me, did something happy happened to you these past few weeks?" Seokjin asked with a soft and calm tone.
Yoongi's eyes shot up almost instantly. His mind suddenly travels down to one thing only - or rather, one person only.
"O-O-Orange .. " Yoongi said, voice barely above a whisper.
"Hmm yes." The doctor answered, and smiles because Yoongi spoke up.
And it's been 2 years since he last did.
"Orange is a happy color, it's like close to the color of the sun."
The painter shook his head, and opens up his mouth to speak again.
"M-Moon .."
Seokjin felt giddly and excited all of a sudden because Yoongi just didn't speak a word, but two words. And he was also glad that the younger is starting to feel comfortable and relaxed in his hold.
"I love the moon too. It brings light to our darkest hours, right?" Seokjin keeps answering in order to let Yoongi feel more confortable and at ease.
He hopes Yoongi will continue speaking up, or maybe speak a whole sentence now.
Yoongi's breathe suddenly evens, and he is now starting to breathing normally. He opens his mouth to speak again, and his next word make Seokjin feel all kinds of mixed emotions,
But positive ones.
"Jimin."
---
"I have big news Van!" Seokjin squeeled on the phone.
He heard some laughter on the other line, and a sound of boxes being dragged around.
"Are you moving things again?" Seokjin asked with an eyebrow raised as he look at the clipboard on his desk.
"Ah hyung, it's my new box that i had it delivered. I just moved it with my foot because it's on the way." The person from the other line explained with his deep voice.
Seokjin chuckles, "anyways, about my news!"
"I'm all ears hyung,"
"Yoongi spoke."
There were a silence on the other line after Seokjin's statement, and the older began to get worried.
"Hello? Van? Hey, you -
"H-He did?"
"Yes Van! Isn't it great? And he just didn't spoke a word, he spoke three!"
Seokjin's lips are now stretched into a wide smile. He leans his back on his swivel chair as and turns around to face his window - the city of Seoul is now completely on his view.
"Great job hyung! Maybe in a few months now he will be okay - or maybe even better."
Seokjin nods, even if he can't be seen by the man he is talking to.
"I hope he does. I heard that Shihyuk has been waiting for him, said he missed his name written on a gold plate," Seokjin said with a giggle.
The male from the other line giggles as well,
"Well, I'm sure manager-nim is hoping for his recovery as well."
"Yeah. I know that too .."
Seokjin turns his chair again and faces his desk, staring at the clipboard again which contains Yoongi's information.
His eyes then travels to a small notebook at the side, where Seokjin puts all the events that has happened in every Yoongi's therapy.
''Hey Van. Can i ask something?" He asked and Van only hums in response.
"Do you know Jimin? Who works at Happy Cup? Hoseok's cousin,"
There was another silence at the other line, and Seokjin became more worried than he did before.
Of course he should. Afterall, he had said a forbidden word.
"I might," Van answered after a few excruciating minutes of silence.
"Why?"
Seokjin doesn't know if he should answer that or not, but he decided to say the latter.
"Nothing, Van."
'It's nothing for you to know,'
--- ☪
AN; Yes sweetie, i got the name Van from BT21 sksksksks

YOU ARE READING
Across The Boundary • Yoonmin
Fanfiction"So, if you are too tired to speak, sit next to me, because I, too, am fluent in silence." ― R. Arnold. ¡Bottom Yoongi ¡Top Jimin Status; COMPLETED Started; May 28, 2020 Finished; July 20, 2020 #1 in Yoonminfic #7 in topjimin