Belonging (Camren)

Panic

Sapphire's POV

I took Toby to my room like Mommy said but now I don't know what to do. I've never been with other littles before. "Soooo what do you wanna do?", I ask him.

"Anything I don't mind, as long as it's something you wanna do", he says. I nod and took out some play dough. Mommy only let me bring 3 colors so I had the blue, he had the red and we shared the yellow.

We both weren't really in our headspaces right now so we asked each other a bunch of questions rather than playing. I learned a lot about him, one is that he's a huge fan of RuPaul's drag race. I asked him if he wants to try drag but he says he doesn't. Sure, I can see his hesitation but I won't push.

I found out how he and his Daddy met. Toby actually was working at a strip club cause he had owed someone a lot of money and really needed work. Turns out, Julio owned the place and when he came to see how the place was doing; they met. They continued to talk days after, eventually becoming a thing and Julio payed off Toby's debt.

"Though even after becoming his little, Julio never lets me get involved with or even talk about mafia business. He says he doesn't want me to see how cruel my Daddy can be. I already know what he does is wrong but I still love him. That won't change.", he says.

"Yeah I'm the same. I know I've only been with them just over a month but I haven't seen any of what they actually do. I don't even know the things they do", I tell him.

"So how did you meet your Mommies anyway?", He asks. I chuckled, "Well it wasn't anything like, meeting each other and falling in love", I told him about the day I was taken and he looks so shocked and concerned right now.

"Okay, I knew they were mafia leaders but, still wasn't expecting that. I knew sometimes human trafficking was apart of this but, still surprises me. You're the first person I've met who's actually been.......you know", he says. I nod understanding. "But are they treating you okay? Are you okay here?", I nod again.

"At first I was scared, like shitting myself scared. I cooperated with them just so I didn't get hurt, while I waited for a chance to escape", I told him what happened with Aiden and what came the next day. I was close to tears talking about it. He hugs me and I lean in.

"I'm alright now though. Honestly I liked how they were treating me. I'm not lying when I say they really do treat me well. They make me feel love that I haven't felt since my parents died. They died when I was really young", I tell him.

"I'm so sorry about that", he says. "You don't have to be sorry", I tell him. He's not the one that should be sorry. I began remembering that day. I always try not to think about it but today's different.

That memory has always been blocked from my mind but FUCKING HELL, why can't I stop thinking about it now?!! I've had that memory buried for years. I was really young, the memories are a blur but I still remember exactly what happened that night.

The more I think about it the more I start to panic and tears begin to flow. I'm feeling numb at this point and all I can see is images of that day. I can feel myself rocking back and forth. I felt so numb, I didn't even realize. It wasn't me that was rocking.

Lauren's POV

After hearing Toby scream, we sprinted to Sapphy's room. Only to find my baby having a panic attack. "Shit what the fuck happened!!??", I ask as I run to pick up my baby. I hold her in my arms, trying to soothe her. "Momma's here baby, you're okay", I say as I rock her.

Sapphy looks destroyed as tears continue to flow through her bloodshot eyes and she's not breathing properly. I'm about to yell at my wife to get her inhaler but I see she's already left. She soon runs back with it and I try to get my baby to use it. "Baby please you need this. Princess please", I desperately try to get my baby to respond.

"That won't work until you get her to calm down. She won't be able to breathe it in", I hear Julio say. I put down the inhaler and continue to rock her.

"Babygirl, it's Mommy. Baby listen to Mommy's breathing", Camila steadies her breathing and makes her breathes longer and gentle. "Hear that baby, breathe with me. Momma will too, we're all gonna breathe as one". She continues and I copy my wife's breathing pattern.

I can see Sapphy trying to match our breathe, her breathing starts to regulate making me relax a little. "That's it baby, you're okay. Mommy and Momma are right here for you. Everything is alright", Camila says.

Once her breathing gets somewhat under control she reaches for her inhaler. I help her take it and she relaxes in my arms. Still wheezing but at least she's able to breathe now. She's exhausted, her eyes are starting to close but she tries to keep them open.

"Everything is okay babygirl, you're okay. If you want to sleep, go ahead. We'll be here", Camila says. Sapphy still hesitates to close her eyes but the exhaustion takes over and soon she's fast asleep. I let out a heavy breathe and my tension visibly leaves my body.

"Put her on the bed Lo, we should let her rest", Camila says. I pick up Sapphire and tuck her into bed. I stroke my baby's cheeks for a sec before kissing her forehead. Camila does the same. "Camz can you stay with her for a sec. I'm gonna find out what happened", I leave before I get an answer.

I find Toby and Julio cuddling on the coach. Toby is crying as he lays on Julio's chest while he rubs his back. He gets up as he sees me, "How is she? Is she okay?", He asks. I nod. "She's asleep, she's alright for now", I can see Toby relax at that as he wipes away the tears from his eyes. "What happened in there?", I ask.

"I don't know, she was fine and smiling up until that moment. It happened so suddenly. We were talking about are lives and it started when she as soon as she mentioned her parents. I don't know why that caused her to panic", he tells me.

"Okay, thanks Toby. And thank you for calling us as quick as you did", "it's alright. Do you have any idea as to why she reacted like that?", He asks. "No, all I know about her parents is that they passed away when she was really young and her uncle took care of her. I don't know any of the details". He nods and holds on to Julio. I know the poor boy was also scared by the whole situation so I leave him alone with his Daddy.

I go back to my girls and find that Camila's fallen asleep next to our baby. I take in the sight for moment, just letting the relief wash over me. I kiss both of their cheeks before getting into bed with them.