19

19 1 0
                                    

Peter's POV

Dianna's been working nonstop on cracking codes for the past hour and a half and I've been trying to work on new gear for my suit.

"Why don't you take a break?" I kissed the crown of her head and wrapped my arms around her shoulders.

She sighed and leaned back into my chest, "I want to put an end to all of this before it gets worse."

"This can wait a couple minutes."

"And it'll only take a couple minutes for things to go sour."

"Don't be so pessimistic."

"I guess I'm just trying to take my mind off the fact that she was using me this whole time to get to Nick. I don't even know which memories are genuine and which ones were fake. Sure we weren't as close as Nick and I are but I still considered her one of my closest friends."

"I felt the same when I found out Quentin was Mysterio. I really trusted him and he ended up stabbing me in the back. Things like this are out of our control. We didn't do anything. They're the ones with the agenda for their own reasons."

"I just wish it wasn't like this."

"I don't think any of us ever want to be betrayed nor do we ever really expect it."

Dianna's POV

I keep telling myself that if I go into this again, things are going to be different. I'm going to be less needy, more confident in myself, and more honest. But every time I think about getting back together with Peter, my mind goes back to MJ. I'm sure Peter's learned his lesson, as have I, but are we really ready for it?

We know how to push each other's buttons until someone breaks and that's toxic. I don't want to put myself back into that position of being in a toxic relationship. We were fine when we were friends, but after we started dating, along the line, life got in the way and the Avengers thing and then the blip.

Yeah, we've been giving each other little kisses here and there and acting like a couple, but if we aren't going to be able to work things out and agree that we need to work on our communication skills as a friends, let alone a couple, the relationship won't last very long. And I don't want to waste my time.

flashback

"Hey, Tony." I set the flowers down, "I wanted to come by to say hi. It's only been a couple days since your funeral but I miss you. Working in your lab isn't the same without the usual sassy, sarcastic remarks that you would make." I laughed, "I'm sorry I wasn't there to say goodbye. I'm sorry I wasn't there to say thank you for all that you've done for me since we first met. There are a lot of things that I'm sorry for. I wish I was there to fight by your side."

I started crying, "I remember when I first snuck around and messed with your technology while you were out. I'd lie and say that I didn't touch anything because nothing interested me. Then you showed me video footage of me in your lab, complimenting the 'impeccable' ideas that I had come up with. After that, you brought them to life.

"We started working side-by-side on the downlow until my dad caught us and gave you so much trash for it. But we all worked it out." I wiped my tears. "You're the one that got me to start using my powers for good and even asked Thor to help me work on some lightning bending.

"Peter's doing alright. He has this Europe trip coming up soon. Morgan and Pepper are still coping. Morgan asks about you every so often. Things've changed thanks to you. You're the person that brought us back and saved this universe. I wish you were still here so that I could give you the biggest hug. I promise I will try to keep your legacy going somehow. I promise I will do whatever it takes to keep Peter safe."

towards the end of Peter's trip

I sat down with some shawarma, "I don't know why you kept insisting that I try shawarma. It doesn't hit my palette right. I'm gonna finish it anyway. I am in desperate need of some comfort food right now." I paused, "Peter comes home in a couple days. Part of me is excited, the other part of me is scared of confrontation. A couple weeks after being brought back, we started arguing over the smallest things. It was getting unhealthy. Then my mom died because she couldn't handle being back. He put his Spider-Man priorities before me so I just pretended that I was doing better.

"Then recently, I found out that Peter's been cheating on me throughout this trip of his and he gave E.D.I.T.H. to Quentin Beck, I don't know if you remember him. It really sucks and I don't even know what I'm going to say to him. I kind of sort of don't really want to tell my dad, seeing that I don't want him to go all 'Hulk smash' on him, so I think for now, I'm just gonna keep it between the two of us. I feel like everything's been tumbling down on me and I don't know what to do. There's a lot going on my mind right now. I feel like I'm suffocating."

the day after the breakup with Peter

"Peter and I broke up." I squatted to have his gravestone at eye level with me, "I guess it was for the best. The arguing was getting too much for the two of us to handle and he never told me about his Europe romance so I think it was best that we put that relationship to rest. The thing that sucks is even though he caused me a lot of pain, I still love him. Is that bad? I've been left with some trust issues."

I scoffed, "I really miss you. I could use some Tony Stark guidance right about now. But Pepper stopped by and gave me the Raava nanosuit you made me. I didn't think I'd ever be so grateful to receive a suit until now. No one else is going to make me suits like this one so I want to really treasure it. I don't want to mess it up. It's the last suit you ever made for anyone."

present day

I stood up, "I'll be back in a bit."

"Where are you going?"

"For a walk. I need some air."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Peter asked.

"I'll be fine. And please don't follow me. I just want to be alone for a bit."

He nodded.

It's no surprise that I was going to talk to Tony again. Catch him up to speed on all that's been going on, tell him about how my life is going, having a casual conversation with his headstone.

"It's been a while, huh?" I said, "There's not much that's happening. That's a lie. I found out Skylar was using me to get closer to Nick and now she wants to take down Spider-Man and the rest of the heroes S.H.I.E.L.D. had on file because of something the Avengers apparently did. I don't know how I'm supposed to handle this. She used her dad's resources to hack into Spider-Man's suit–I have to be cautious with mentioning his name because I don't know who's really around. These people could be spies for all I know." I sat down and whispered.

"I'm in this grey area with Peter right now. We've been acting really couple-y and I'm pretty sure if you were here, you'd make fun of us for it. I'm not ready to get back into the relationship. I constantly have to remind myself that I can't but my heart keeps telling me to give into the temptation.

"Maybe I miss the thought of him more than I actually miss him. I miss all the good times that we had. But I don't know if I can trust him. I'm paranoid that he's going to cheat on me again. I feel like if I tell him how I feel about all of this, it's going to start another argument and that's what I'm trying to avoid.

"Graduation's right around the corner. I know you'll be there to watch me walk across that stage and get my diploma. I know you and Nat will be there. I don't really know if Steve is... you know... dead yet so I don't want to mention his name in case he isn't. I haven't spoken nor seen him in a hot minute. I've been so worried about getting into schools that I've applied to. I've gotten into none of them so far. I applied to MIT so we'll see if I get accepted, hopefully I do. I'll be sure to let you know." I smiled.

Talking to Tony was always a stress reliever. Even when he was still alive and while my dad was MIA, he would always listen to me and give me great advice. I know he didn't want to be dismissive, like Howard, he treated me like one of his own.

Why don't I talk to my own dad about this? We're both still working on coping with all that's happened. He was the Hulk for two years, then came back to Earth, had to deal with Thanos, had to deal with his family being gone for 5 years, his friends died, his wife died. We're both still going through it. Me being upset is probably the last thing he wants to see right now.

secrets || p.p.Where stories live. Discover now