{김홍중}
"I'm tired of giving people what they want and doing things that please them. Why aren't I allowed to do what I want?"
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ATEEZ SERIES: PART 1
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c h a p t e r e i g h t e e n : c o n f r o n t a t i o n
When his lips touched yours, Hongjoong was in a state of elation. Nothing could ruin that special moment with you. That is, until she popped into his head. In shock, he pulled away from you, unaware of how much it hurted you.
He could see you trying to reach out to him, but whenever he looked at your face, her features were there. It looked so real, even if it wasn't and at that moment, Hongjoong knew he needed to leave.
"Jina, I-I'm sorry but I need to go."
Rushing out of the party, Hongjoong bumped into Siwon who had pulled him into a conversation with other reporters. Microphones and recorders where being shoved into his face, all of them asking for news on his songs. Feeling claustrophobic, Hongjoong quickly apologized before running out of the venue. Finding one of the valet workers, he asked for his car with an anxious tone.
Once it pulled up to the front, Hongjoong thanked the man before entering his vehicle and driving out to the roads of downtown Seoul. He loosened his tie when he was a good distance away from the venue as he hastily thought of where to go.
A large part of him didn't want to go home. His friends knew about his past relationships and Seonghwa would have definitely killed him if he found out how he left you alone. His mind then wandered to the thought of you.
Hongjoong knew it was stupid of him to leave you in a position like that. Even if what he was feeling could be real, he still led you on and now, he didn't know if you were ever going to forgive him or not.
At the end, he settled on his studio. It had always been a safe haven for him. There were no interruptions, no distractions and best of all, no love problems. Pulling into the garage of the entertainment, Hongjoong parked his car before heading up to his studio, his suit jacket thrown over his shoulder.
Unlocking the door, he immediately put up a sign on the doorknob, warning anyone about entering. After changing into an extra set of clothes he always kept in his studio, Hongjoong sat down at his desk. He sent a quick text to Seonghwa, explaining how he would be in the studio for an unknown amount of time to prevent a search party being sent out for him and soon threw himself into his work.
Days had passed and each day Hongjoong would end up receiving messages from his roommates and even Siwon asking if everything was okay, but he would always ignore it. He hadn't received a message from you yet, so he concluded that any kind of relationship with you was never going to happen.
Hongjoong simply continued working on his song, his large headphones making it impossible to hear any outside noise. Just as he was completely fixated on his work, he felt a tap on his shoulder, causing him to flinch. Turning around, he saw Minsung with an angered look on his face.
"We need to talk."
Turning back to his music, Hongjoong shrugged his shoulders before saying "Can't. I'm too busy." Just as he began working on the beginning of a new song, his screen went black. Eyes widened in shock, Hongjoong whipped his head to see Minsung holding the cable out of its socket. "It's about Jina. You turned her into a wreck and don't even have the decency to apologize?"
Feeling a pang to his chest, Hongjoong realized that he still had not apologized for his actions. Frustrated, he buried his head into his hands. "What the hell am I going to do? I messed up badly."
Minsung let out a deep sigh as he pulled up a chair next to Hongjoong. "I know this isn't my place to say, but Jina likes you a lot. You've affected her in ways no one else has." Upon hearing those words, Hongjoong shot his head up with bloodshot eyes as Minsung continued. "Right now, she needs to know whether or not you're willing to be with her. That way she can know whether she needs to heal or not."
Standing up, Minsung patted Hongjoong on the back before making his way towards the door. "If you want to find her, she's at the park a couple of blocks away from here. Good luck." After hearing him leave, Hongjoong quickly grabbed his jacket before exiting his studio. Not willing to wait for the elevator, he ran down the countless flights of stairs until he made it to the exterior of the building.
Running through the streets like a mad man, he earned looks from all the pedestrians .But Hongjoong didn't care. Right now, he knew more than anything else that he needed to get to you and tell you exactly how he felt. He couldn't bear to lose you.
As soon as he made it to the park's entrance, he quickly glanced around the area, attempting to catch his breath. His eyes finally landed on you. You were seated at a bench, your headphones on as you watched the different people walk past you. A bright smile painted its way onto his lips as he walked over towards you, a skip in each step.
Once he was right by you, he sat down and caught your attention. You stared at him in shock, uncertain if you should leave or not. Twisting his body to face you, you took off your headphones to allow him to speak. Exhaling a long breath out, Hongjoong's eyes met yours as he began to speak with a shaky voice.
"First off, I want to apologize for my behaviour that night. Despite what was going on, I shouldn't have left you alone. I should've been stronger." You softly smiled before saying "Seonghwa roughly told me about your past relationship. I don't know all the details, but I do know that she did do some damage."
Shaking his head, Hongjoong looked down at his fingers, too ashamed to face you. "That shouldn't have been an excuse. I should've been there for you, because you are a thousand times the woman she will ever be."
Hearing him say those words, you felt your broken heart slowly begin to mend. Looking back up at you, Hongjoong continued with a more stable voice. "I know we haven't known each other for a very long time, but I need to tell you that I think I love you Jina."
Taking your hand into his, Hongjoong went on. "I want to be around you all the time and give you everything you desire. I'll follow you wherever you go because I'm more than satisfied whenever I'm with you. If you gave me a chance, please let me love and admire you. Please."
You began to tear up at his heartfelt words as you nodded with no hesitation. With a wide smile present on his face, Hongjoong pulled you into a tight hug, allowing you to burrow your face in the crevice of his neck. Though it was loud outside with the large amount of people in the area, you still managed to hear Hongjoong's whispers;
