Ophelia

Chapter 18

I laid there in a bed that wasn't mine and thought about things. Benjamin hadn't been pulling my leg, he wasn't pretending to be civil. He said he cared. He saw my mangled body and cared.

I didn't understand. How does one go from wanting nothing to do with me, to being overbearing, and then to being decent. Even after I told him to stay away, I found myself around him more than I hoped for.

Minutes passed and I just wanted to go home. I'm sure Elliot was worried... or asleep somewhere... and I was absolutely starving. I'm sure Ben and everyone wouldn't mind if I went into their kitchen for water. Right? Just as my feet slid off the edge of the bed and touched the floor, my weight shifted forward and forced me down. I fell straight onto the soft carpet with a thud.

The door slammed open and I was immediately lifted into someone's arms. "Ophelia!" One minute I'm on the floor and the next I'm flush against Benjamin's chest being cradled like a wounded child. I stayed curled in shock, my eyes wide and my mouth agape. Together we sat on the floor, wrapped in an embrace. "Ophelia? What happened?" He said softly.
I began to shake—not out of fear or anger, but confusion. I was upset and so very confused and here I was in pain and hungry and wrapped up in the mate-who-didn't-want-me's arms. Soon enough my bottom lip began to pout and tear started sprouting from my eyes. I felt him tense up, unsure of what to do. "Ophelia, what's wrong?"

"I–I'm... I'm so confused," I whined into his shirt, letting the tears drip down.

I felt him sigh and tighten his arms around me. His chin sat on the top of my head as he began to gently sway left and right. "I know. I am too."

"I don't know which way to turn anymore! I hate this! I hate this–this... virus! I hate that I want to stay away from you because you want nothing from me! And I hate that I always find my way back to you!"

"I know."

"I hate that this all falls on me! I am twenty years old and I have never had just one minute to be frig–no! I have never had a chance to be f*cking normal! I never got to have a boyfriend,  I never got to go to a school dance, not even a football game without being heavily guarded!" I began to heavily pant in my angry state. Ben said nothing but began rubbing circles on my back. "I came here to escape and learn! But no! I am being attacked by rabid vampires and being rejected by my mate!, so on top of being a student, I am also curing a mythological disease as well as a broken heart!"

"Breathe, Ophelia. Take a minute to catch your breath." He said quietly. I grit my teeth but I listened. I slowed my breathing, feeling myself become less heated.  Ben slowly inhaled before getting off the ground. He carried me back to bed and gently placed me down, sitting to face me.

He reached over, gently taking my face in his hands to wipe away my tears. I studied his face for a moment, his lite eyes were soft but filled with emotion. "Why... why do you care?" I asked, sniffling.

He sighed. "Like you said, even though I try to stay away I always find myself coming right back to you. I... I just do... care, that is."

"But... you don't want me..."

"I don't know what I want, Ophelia. I'm feeling just as conflicted as you. I'm not good with emotions, attachments. But whenever I'm around you, I feel... different." He closed his eyes and took a breath, "But I can't stand in your way. You aren't ready for me, and I'm not ready for you."

"What do you mean?"

He looked away, refusing to meet my eyes. "You are innocent, fragile...inexperienced." He looked at me as my cheeks tinged pink. He gave a soft smile. "I... you have Casper. He's the kind one. He will be the one to take you on dates and hold your hand. He has time. He's the good one. I'm rough and callous. I'm running a pack of vampires as well as other things. I wouldn't be able to give you the time you deserve."

"I'm not fragile. And I'm not as innocent as you think. I can handle you."

His eyebrow raised at my challenge. "Princess, you're pure. If I were to pursue you, you wouldn't know what to do." His eyes began to get dark as a playful smirk grew on his face. He chuckled when I looked away, breaking away from his intense gaze.

I sat and watched him for a moment but he took my silence as a sign that I wanted him to leave. He was halfway to the door when I blurted, "What if I wanted you to?"

He stopped in his tracks. I slid myself to the edge of the bed again, this time holding onto the bottom bed post as I got up. As soon as I felt myself wobbling, Ben was in front of me making sure I wouldn't fall. I took a step forward, putting myself close to him, looking up into his eyes. "Pursue me." I said, mocking his words. Now he was the one frozen. He stared down at me, almost conflicted. I smirked, slowly moving my eyes from his down to his lips as I took another slight-step inwards, the gap between us nearly closed.

He growled, a low rumble coming from his chest. I was so close I could nearly feel it. "Don't," he said. His voice was almost breathy, like he was struggling with control. Good. "You don't want me to, you said it yourself, at the beach."

"What if I changed my mind?" I looked back up at him, his eyes swirling with lust and something else. "You said I'm inexperienced. Teach me. Give me something to experience."

Ben instantly inched forward, his one hand grasping my waist while the other held the back of my head. His lips came crashing down against mine and my eyes fluttered closed. Like he said, he was rough, but definitely not callous. There was nothing emotionless about it.

His lips broke away, allowing me to gasp for air, but then his lips met the skin on my neck. My breathing became heavy while he worked away on the spot between my neck and collarbone, nipping at it before pulling away. My cheeks burned and my skin felt sparks everywhere he had touched. "Why... why'd you stop?"

He gave a half smile, "You're not ready for me to continue. Besides, Casper needs a chance."

"Again with Casper!" I growled. "He's not my mate! You are!"

He brushed some hair away from my face, tucking it behind my ear. "But he can give you things that I can't. He has a crush on you, you can't hurt him over one lustful moment with me. Give him and yourself a chance."

"But..."

Suddenly, Benjamin was smirking. A mischievous glint twinkled in his eye as he stepped back. "Don't worry. I'm not just going to walk away and let him have all the fun. I'm going to give you a chance to be with him, so you see how he is better for you. But I can promise you," his eyes flickered you my lips, "I am not done with those lips."

"So you're turning this into a game? I told you what I wanted and you still think I can't handle you?"

"You don't know what you want, Ophelia." He backed up, turning towards the door again.

"Fine. If it's a game you want, it's a game you'll get!" I yelled after him. He replied with a smirk and left me again, on my own.