Selfless

45

I held Mia in my arms as the girls and I watched a movie. I was exhausted and wanted to go to bed but I knew I wouldn't be able to get myself up the stairs without Colby. The girls could help me walk around but they weren't strong enough to make sure I was safe going up and down the stairs. I bounced Mia and let my eyes close for a second.

As soon as I did I heard the boys coming into the house laughing about something that happened while they were filming.

"Hey guys!" Sam yelled happily at us as I forced my eyes open. Jake ran in and scooped Tara up, peppering her face with kisses as she laughed, and Sam plopped down next to Kat, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. Corey and Devyn have been getting a little friendly recently, it almost felt like they were going to get back together soon as he sat next to her and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Hey baby girl, how are you feeling?" Colby asked and grabbed Mia from me before sitting down. "Hmm tired." I mumbled and melted into his side as he wrapped his free arm around me. "How was filming?" I asked him as he rubbed small circles onto my arm, "it was fun, I missed exploring." He said causing me to bolt up in shock. I groaned in pain as everyone looked over, "sorry.." I grunted and took a deep breath, collecting myself.

"You went exploring?! Colby, you can't get arrested again." I said as he pulled me back into him with a smirk on his lips, "where we went it was perfectly legal. Don't worry baby, I'm not getting arrested again." He assured and kissed my head, "if you do I swear to god I will shove a broomstick up your ass." I mumbled causing him to chuckle, "why a broomstick?" He asked as I rolled my eyes, "I don't know, Brock. The point is don't get arrested again." I grumbled and rested my head fully onto his chest again.

I focused on his heartbeat as we continued watching the movie in front of us. I could feel myself starting to fall asleep but I wanted to spend time with everyone so I leaned up and reached for my walker, "where are you going?" Colby asked as I struggled to stand up. He reached up and help me up but pushing my butt up.

"I could have done it myself." I said and he laughed, "I know I just wanted to touch your ass." He said as I rolled my eyes at him. "Where are you going?" He asked again as I started to walk to the kitchen, "I'm hungry." I said as he chuckled, "okay, let me know if you need help." He said as I made my way to the kitchen.

When I got there I had to stop to breathe for a second. I shuffled to the fridge and pulled out a bowl of fruit salad. I scrunched my brow and tried to figure out how to hold it and walk at the same time, since it was in a big bowl and I couldn't really get a good grip on it.

I was determined to do it myself though, I didn't need help.

I tucked the bowl under my left arm and put most of my weight on my right arm as I tried to shuffle and scoot to the counter but I was putting too much weight on one side of the walker sending it toppeling to the ground, with me along with it.

I screamed as I prepared to hit the ground, but I never did. Instead I felt someone's arms catch under my armpits. It still hurt like a bitch, but not nearly as much as it would have if I hit the ground.

"I knew it." Sams voice said from behind me. "You knew what?" I asked as he stood my walker up and helped stand me up straight. "I knew you were going to push yourself too far. You have to be careful dude. You would have been fucked if I didn't just catch you." He scolded as he bent down to start cleaning the fruit that had spilled everywhere.

"I just feel like such a child Sam, I don't know. It's demoralizing having to be babied at 22 years old." I said and leaned against the counter. "I know it's frustrating, but hurting yourself again will only drag on this process. I get it though, I really do Cor. I just don't want to see you in pain anymore. It makes me sad." He said and frowned causing me to frown.

"I'll be more careful. I'm sorry." I apologized causing him to smile, "don't sweat it, I just want what's best for you, now what did you want to eat? A Sammy?" He asked and raised his brows making me laugh, "I would love a sammy, Sammy." I said and sat down at the island.

He fixed me up a sandwich and carried it as we walked back to the movie room. When we got back Colby smiled at me and held his arm out for me to sit down next to him again. I snuggled in as Sam handed me my sandwich, "thanks Sammy." I said and smiled up at him as he went back to Kat.

We all hung out for a while until I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. "You tired?" Colby asked as I yawned, "yeah, I think it's time for bed." I said and leaned up so he could get up, "I'll put Mia to bed while you get to the stairs, sound good?" He asked as I stood up, "yep! Meet you at the stairs." I said and started making my way out of the room.

By the time I got to the stairs I was so worn out that Colby just carried me upstairs without question. When we got into the room he laid me on the bed then sighed, "you okay?" I asked as he ruffled his hair. "We need to talk." He said which caused my heart to stop.

"Is everything okay?" I asked and sat up a little more. "I don't know. Kat told me about your little outburst at the dress fitting." He said as my face shifted to one of confusion. "My little outburst? Since when are they outbursts? I got upset. That's it." I said feeling a little defensive. "You threw your walker Cora! The thing you need to be able to stand.  Do you even care that you could have gotten hurt?" He asked crossing his arms in front of him.

Why was he so upset over this?

"Of course I care! Why would you think I don't care!" I yelled feeling my heart start to ache. "I don't know Cor! I just don't like hearing that you put yourself in a situation where you could have gotten hurt again. I don't like that!" He yelled with anger in his eyes as tears welled in my own.

"Well sorry I had a fucking mental breakdown and wasn't thinking about if would hurt me. I'm sorry that I had to see myself in a wedding dress with a fucking walker in front of me because I had to have brain surgery a month before my wedding was supposed to be!! Im sorry that I got upset because I hated the way I looked in the dress that was supposed to make me happy. I'm sorry that I'm such a fuck up, Cole!" I yelled and cried as his face fell. I took a deep breath as tears flowed freely down my cheeks, "I'm sorry that I hate myself right now." I said quietly and looked him in the eye.

"Cora..." he breathed out and came over but I pushed him away. "No." I said and forced myself to get out of the bed. "I...I didn't know." He said quietly as I forced myself to walk across the room, "I know you didn't. It doesn't matter. We need space right now." I huffed out and continued to leave the room. "You stay here, I'll go." He said but I just turned and glared at him.

"Let me go, Cole." I said and turned back around, not liking the hurt look that was on his face.

I hated fighting with him, but every couple fights right?

I heard him sniffle behind me as I trudged forward.

What were we even fighting about?

It didn't matter, I just needed some space from him. I think the tension of him taking care of me 24/7 was starting to boil over.

I turned around, "please don't cry. We just need a night apart. Im gonna sleep in the guest room, I'll see you in the morning." I said with a sigh as he looked at me with glassy eyes.

"Even if you don't love yourself, I'll always love you enough for both of us. Please don't forget that." He said quietly which caused a rip of pain to go through my heart.

"I won't. I love you too. I'll see you in the morning." I said then turned and shakily left the room.

My heart stayed with him though.