5SOS Imagines/Preferences ✓

You/He Dies.

You/He Dies.

Why am I witting this? 😭

(A/N: Check out Mikey up top (on the side) it made me emotional. Also, I'll still post these on @hakunahemmings on IG but I've also created @isithiorhemmings where I will post only my imagines and edits because some people only follow for them).

Calum: (Him): I pull up at the cemetery with a bouquet of flowers in my hand. I open the gates and begin to walk to Calum's grave, sadly knowing exactly where to find it without needing a guide or any help. I take out the old flowers and place them behind me before I rest the fresh flowers in their place. I sit down cross-legged right next to where he lies. I read over the words engraved on his tomb and my fingers trace over his name. "Hey Cal, it's me." I speak. I know it might seem a little crazy to the people who don't understand but talking to him helps me forget for a while about everything else. "I brought you some flowers again." I say. "I miss you and things have been getting really hard again." I talk to him, looking upwards to stop myself from crying. I smile softly with my eyes glazed with tears. It was the kind of smile you force upon yourself when you're so utterly upset. The kind when you don't want to cry. "Everyone tells me that it gets easier and I know it's only been a few weeks but things are worse and you're not coming home. I wish you could though. I wish we never got in that stupid fight and I wish you never chased me after I took off. Maybe then I'd be the one buried in the ground and it wouldn't be you. The boys are a mess. Ashton loses his temper so easily now which is understandable, but no one knows what to do without you. You sort of held our world together. And now that you're gone, everyone's falling apart. Michael and Luke have been arguing a bit lately. I always have to step in and thankfully they get over it in a few minutes but it's like they don't want to sometimes. Mali's very quiet now. You weren't just her little brother Cal, you were her best friend. And me? Well I'm trying to be strong for you and everyone but no one can make me feel better just as good as you. I haven't been sleeping well and I keep forgetting to eat. I keep forgetting you're not coming home. But I want you to. I hope you're ok wherever you are, Calum. Maybe you could watch down on us and let us know you're with us when things get too bad. Maybe you already are. Wherever you've gone, I hope you're ok. I miss you so much. I've thought about joining you but then a part of me tells me that you want me to stay here. I know you'll wait for me no matter how long I take. I'm so sorry, baby. I love you. Always."

Ashton: (You): I stand with my head hung low and my hands held in front of me. Y/N's parents stand to one side of me whilst the boys on my other, Calum directly at my side. This suit itches but I wear it for Y/N. That's probably the only reason I ever do things these days. 'Y/N wouldn't want you to stop eating' or 'Y/N would want you to go'. None of it's what I want but I know they're right, about her wanting it for me so I do it. The priest continues to talk about Y/N's life: her short, sweet life of only 19 years. It angers me how people feel he has the right to say all this when in reality, he never knew the girl and if he did, he would know that Y/N deserves much more than the words he is describing her by. Things about how beautiful she was and how nothing makes sense without her and how her smile could make you smile just by looking at it. Those are the things you'll remember about her. "Now we are going to hear a few words from Y/N's boyfriend, Ashton." I hear the priest announce. I breathe in a sharp breath as Calum gives me a light pat on the back, pushing me forward encouragingly. I move up towards the stand and my hands uncontrollably shake as I pull out the crumbled piece of paper from my pocket. "Um..." I mumble, as I try to steady my breaths enough to talk. I look to the coffin lying before me and my chest aches knowing she's lying in there. I drag my hand across my jawline roughly and it takes everything in me not to cry. The boys all give me empathetic looks and her parents offer me a sad smile encouraging me to begin. "Y/N was everything to me." I start, quickly looking up to everyone. "I met her a few years ago and I guess it didn't take long for her to become important to me. Uh, she was beautiful." I remind everyone tears streaming down my face. "I remember the moment when I first knew I loved her. I went to her house to surprise her as I had been away with the boys for a few weeks and her bedroom door was open a crack. I looked in and I saw her dancing around and singing to one of her favourite songs. She didn't know I was there for a while and she became so beautifully flustered when she noticed me. That was two years ago and I've came to love her more and more each day." I continue to talk about her. I know it's not long until I break down but I just hope to say this last part. "It was only the other week when I started really thinking about things. I realised how much she meant to me how and how she had came into my life and completely changed my world and soon after, became it. I remember thinking to myself: 'she is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with'." I look up and I see majority of people crying. Luke has tears running down his face as Michael slings his arm over his shoulder. Luke offers me a genuine smile while still crying and I know what he's feeling. He remembering all the he loves about Y/N and he's smiling because there's so much to love. He gives me a quick nod and I continue. "And in a way, I will spend the rest of my life with her. I'm never going to forget her, that's for sure. But she really changed me as a person and you can't really stop loving someone like her." I'm at the point where my lips are trembling and I fight back the urge to cry. "Gosh, I love her. I miss her like crazy and it's only been a week. I hope she's watching down on us and that she never leaves us entirely. Honestly, I don't think I'm ever going to be ok without her but I'm going to try. Because I know that's what she wants." I look to my parents for that part with a light smile due to the constant reminders to do things for her. "I'm going to miss you a lot baby." I say, now crying. "But I know where to find you. I'll see you again one day. I love you Y/N."

Luke: (Him): The moment the doctor told us, it was like everything else wasn't really there and the only thing I could hear were the cries erupting from us all. My heart stopped for a moment and I began to choke on my tears. My legs gave in and I fell to the floor, reaching out to grab something on my way down. As soon as I hit the floor the tears started coming and I was left the same as the others. I held my head in my hands as I rocked back and forth begging for this not to be real. That maybe I would wake up in a few seconds and this would all be some nightmare and Luke would be waking up beside me, assuring me that's he's there. But this was real... I saw Calum rush out the doors and I wish that I had the strength to chase after him. To tell him that we'll all be ok. Michael and Ashton were leaning on each for support not knowing what else to do. I had no idea where Luke's family were but I only hoped that that were given the chance to say goodbye. I saw the large doors connecting to our private waiting room burst open and my mother came running through. Her eyes landed on me at first glance and she was running over to me in an instant. She kneeled down beside me and took me into her arms, cradling me. "He's gone." I cried out to her as if she didn't know. "Luke." I whimpered his name in the most excruciating pain I have ever felt. "He's gone."

Michael: (You): Only hours ago I was sitting beside Y/N, holding her weak hand in mine, reassuring us both that we'd be fine; and now, after her heart stopping, she's going through surgery where numerous amount of doctors are trying to keep her alive and I am unable to help in anyway. Everyone is silent. No one knows what to say or do but I'm just thankful that they're all here. I've been trying to prepare myself for the worst outcome, if she might not make it, but I can't imagine a world without her. In all honesty, I'd rather die then wake up alone, never seeing the way the sun pours through the blinds and beams on her face, waking her up in the most beautiful way. Before I can think any further, a doctor enters the room and I am immediately to my feet, standing up in front of him. He formally shakes my hand as a greeting and I try to read his facial expressions to find out. He reaches up and slowly removes his medical hat, bringing it down to hold in his hands. My breathing hitches in my throat and I look up to him, already knowing what he's going to say. "I'm very sorry for your loss." I look away from him and crouch down to the floor, resting my head in my hands waiting to either explode with anger, or breakdown in sadness. The tears effortlessly spill out my eyes and my body shakes lightly. One of the boys bends down beside me and I look up to see Luke. He doesn't say anything like "we'll be ok", because maybe he knows that we won't. Instead, he sits down beside me, offering comfort by slinging an arm over my shoulder and crying too, reminding me that I'm not entirely alone. "Luke, this isn't fair!" I cry out, pulling at my hair in frustration. I manage to catch my breath just enough to whisper: "I love her".

I was crying while writing Calum's and DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED IN ASHTON'S.

30/12/14

I love you. Always.
- HakunaHemmings ❤️