Hermitcraft Oneshots

Who killed him?

AN: Video is not mine

Scene opens:

[Doc, Stress, False, Iskall, Mumbo, Cleo, Ren, and Joe are standing around Grian's body. He has a trident in his back and is laying on the ground. (with cross-eyes)]

Doc: So. Who killed him? I'm not mad. I just want to know.

Stress: [raises hand guiltily] I did. I killed him.

Doc: No. No, you didn't. Iskall?

Iskall: Don't look at me! [pause] Look at Mumbo!

Mumbo: What! I didn't kill him!

Iskall: Huh. That's weird. How'd you even know he was dead?

Mumbo: Because he's laying right in front of us, and he's d e a d

Iskall: Suspicious.

Mumbo: No, It's not!

Joe: I don't know if it matters, probably not.... but Cleo was the last one to see him.

Cleo: Liar! I barely ever talk to him!

Joe: Oh yeah? Then what were you doing by his base earlier?

Cleo: I was borrowing some string from Mumbo. Everyone knows that, JOE.

Stress: Ok, let's not fight. I killed him, I'll tell X, Doc.

Doc: No! Who killed him?

Ren: [whispering] Doc, False has been awfully quiet

False: REALLY!?!??

Ren: Yeah, really!

[Arguing commences]

Doc: ... I killed him. He touched my bush so I stabbed him.

[Turns around]

I predict ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a piglin head on a stick.

[Long pause] Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.