Hermitcraft Oneshots

First experience at Sahara?

Based on the sketch: Buying a Bed. Yes its still Monty Python's flying circus. Video is not mine. This is another I couldn't find the clip for, my apologies. 

Bdubs: Hello, Keralis suggested I come to Sahara for a few things?

Mumbo: Certainly sir, I'll get someone to help you. I should probably warn you that our item system is broken for today, and while we're trying to fix it we're stocking and delivering manually. As a matter of fact, a lot of things have been going weirdly today.

Bdubs: Alright, thanks for letting me know!

Mumbo: Grian!

Grian: (Sits up from totally not being asleep on the job) Can I help you?

Bdubs: Yes, first I need a shulker box of golden carrots, preferably under 20 diamonds. Does that work?

Grian: Oh no, I'm afraid not. Our cheapest box of golden carrots is 160 diamonds.

Bdubs: 160 diamonds!

Mumbo: Before I go, I ought to have told you that Grian does tend to exaggerate. Every figure he gives you will be ten times too high. It's a new problem.

Bdubs: Oh, I see.

Mumbo: Otherwise he's perfectly all right.

(He leaves)

Bdubs: I see. Er... your cheapest box is.....16 diamonds then?

Grian: 160 diamonds, yes, sir.

Bdubs: Ok. What about logs? I heard you had shulker boxes of logs?

Grian: Yes, 270 stacks per box.

Bdubs: (To himself) Ok so, 27 stacks? (to Grian) And what's the price?

Grian: The price is... er... just a moment. Mumbo, what is the price of the logs box?

Mumbo: Ummmm, 8 diamonds I think.

Bdubs: 8 diamonds!? That's really cheap!

Grian: Yes, remembering of course that you have to multiply everything Mumbo says by three. It's nothing he can help, you understand. Things are going rather oddly today.

Bdubs: I see, I'm sorry.

Grian: Anything else?

Bdubs: Yes, I need some redstone components for a project!

Grian: Ok I think we stocked that yesterday.

Bdubs: How much will it be?

Grian: Er, Mumbo should be able to tell you that. Mumbo! Could you show these ten good people the concrete maker, please?

Bdubs: Concrete maker? No, no, I need redstone!

Grian: (in a whisper) I'm sorry, you have to say 'concrete maker' to Mumbo, because if you say 'redstone' he puts a bucket over his head. I should have explained. He's been like this all day. It's getting a bit annoying.

Bdubs: Ah. I see. (Walks over to Mumbo) Excuse me, could you show me the concrete maker, please?

Mumbo: (confused) The concrete maker?