Under Control.

9. Him just him

Ps. Chapters in italics are memories. Normal font chapters are present time eg. how it all started. Italics are what happened after, normal font is what happened before. I've never written a zig zag story, wanted to try that out. Thanks for reading x

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Dismissing everything after that night, he decided not to be too hands on. He wasn't her friend and yes, her roommate was right. He was definitely crossing boundaries that he shouldn't. They did not see much of each other after that. He tried not to mind her presence in his lectures. He opted to dismissing any sort of fondness he felt for her as a student or whatever or however it may have seem or may be portrayed. Hunter was well aware that this was a route, he did not want to take. It was leading to it. He could feel his heart racing with excitement when she was around. The excitement and need to want to be around her constantly even after hours. She intrigued him, that was for sure. The emails, oh goodness the emails. It happened so fast, from her sending an email to confirm an assignment error, for his suggestions and help here and there to them sexting. Was it sexting? He had merely... played along to a very sexually related response. Feeling guilty, Hunter googled the definition of sexting to assure himself that he had not done anything wrong. They had not shared any explicit images. They had simply... described how... uhm... they w-would... likely... fuck-if-it-was-possible.

'Sexting is sending, receiving, or forwarding sexually explicit messages, photographs, or images, primarily between mobile phones, of oneself to others. It may also include the use of a computer or any digital device.'

Alright, it was definitely sexting. Hunter let out a sigh, looking around the room; behind his back, he was tempted to re-read the emails again. He did not have her number but something about emails was far superior than texts or snaps. Something about emails was professional and yet so cunning. Something about her being his student turned him on, admittedly. Did this mean he was a pedophile? He felt guilty. He felt panicked. He needed to avoid her. Hunter told himself that he had a great sex life and his marriage was a happy one. Why would the thought of bending another woman over his desk excite him?

'Pedophilia, the sexual attraction to children who have not yet reached puberty.'

Karishma had very well reached puberty, she was twenty years old. Stunning... he thought. She had these beautiful hazel brown eyes that constantly drew him in. To think he had only known her for a couple of months and here she was bringing him to the brink of desperation. He felt out of touch with his emotions, he wanted this but he didn't want this. A lump sat on his throat restraining him from entertaining any thoughts of her. He had a beautiful wife, kind and supportive. Regardless everything about this bothered him. His attraction towards her, he did not want to seem like a groomer or a professor who usually does this with each and every student in his class. For a second he typed out an apology-

Good day Miss Naidoo.

I'm aware of the ill behavior that I might have displayed but truthfully. The email was sent past working hours. I had a little too much too drink. I'm a happily married man and I adore my wife. I apologize for any inconvenience that I may have caused. I care for you as I do all my other students as a concerned educator. I ought to see you like one of my own children. We need to know our places. My apologies if it did not come across that way.

After reading it over and over again. He sighed, contemplating if he should press send. Hunter found it difficult because he had thoroughly enjoyed every single email they spent the whole night sending each other. He found it enjoyable to read words, imagine it and instantly be a aroused. He gulped down a feeling of discontent. Pushing himself to do what's right, he sent it through. There was no turning back after this. There was definitely no coming back from his word after this email. It had to be done, he convinced his thoughts, mind and body. Calm but anxious, he decided it was time to sleep. His guilt, pushed him to go be with his wife. His guilt, forced him to be sweeter than usual to cover up for the deeds he had done behind her back. In denial was the feeling, it worked both ways.