Under Control.

10. 𝘐'𝘥 𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦.

Supper was quiet. After putting their daughter to bed, Hunter felt he had nothing to say to his wife. Not after she had decided to publicize their entire marriage out to public. He was tired, more so drained. Any conversation they had ended up being an argument. They were learning to communicate properly without yelling in each other's faces from frustration. Getting ready for bed, on his side, he heard Rachel let out a sigh.

"I'm surprised you kept your word and decided to sleep home today."

"Like I said, I'm trying. We're trying to give this another shot." Hunter replied somberly.

"Right..." Rachel mumbled. "How's your mistress?"

"I'd rather not talk about her please, how do we move past this if we keep going back and forth?"

"It was only a question, what was so special about her? I'm really curious Hunter, what was so special about her? You really allowed a student to play with our marriage."

What was so special about her?

— even Hunter could not answer that question either.

"Thank goodness, you did not make her pregnant. Do you understand how much harder it would have been? She would have used that against you. Used the baby as leverage. For goodness sake were you even thinking about your job and how far you've worked to be here, it could all just disappear because of such a small mistake. Perhaps she was trying to get a green card—"

Hunter knew, Karishma did not want anything from him. Nothing besides, him being bold enough to leave his marriage for her. Nothing but him being open to starting over with her. Something he was not ready to do. He had created a life with Rachel and as amazing as it sounded to start over with Karishma... it just wasn't— going to work. What if Karishma turned out to be a fling? What if he adored her because he couldn't fully have her? What if she was only exciting because of the positions they were both in (student and professor)? What if he was thrilled by them sneaking around? What would happen if he realized that's the only thrill that drove him towards her. What if that's all it turned out to be? What if the fire died out as soon as they made it official? What if it was all in the chase? Having what you can't have.

"Good night Rachel."

"You can not even speak of her without being upset huh?" His wife pushed.

"Look..." he murmured softly, slight frustrated. "Karishma and I are over. I don't see why we need to keep discussing her. I'm here with you, I'm happy being here. Suppose that's what you want to hear?"

"No! Why did you even pursue her in the first place? If you were so happy with our marriage, why did you go looking for her?"

He couldn't answer.

Every question felt like a burden.

Blinking, looking everywhere except her direction. "All that matters is... uhm that it's over. It's all in the past."

"I hope so, Hunter. I hope so because you've really hurt me. There's only so much I can take from this."

"I know and I'm sorry."

Rachel sniffled a few tears away. "You always say that Hunter. You always say you're sorry then you go back to her. I-i get it, she is young and beautiful. I get that maybe I'm not as exciting as I used to be. I get it that Karishma is different. You being a white man who has never dated outside his race. That must have really excited you. My point is you're always sorry, you've been sorry for the past three years now. You were sorry but then you took her on a Bahamas trip. You were sorry then you bought her an apartment. You were really sorry then you took her to Disney land for the weekend. You're always always sorry and frankly your apologies mean nothing at this point. You say one thing then go and do the next."