MEDTECH SERIES #1
Estelita Isabel Figueroa just graduated from Senior High School, and finally getting a taste of freedom, living in Quezon City adds a check to her long list of bucket list, choosing her degree program--BS in Medical Technology adds...
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"Telly, you're really sure about this?" I continued packing my stuff. Napahiga naman sa kama ko si Mommy habang pinapanood lang akong mag-empake ng gamit. "Quezon City is... you know, a scary place, probably."
Natawa naman ako sa sinabi niya at napaupo na lang sa tabi niya, "I can't just let opportunities pass forever, ma. I can't let my condition hinder me from trying to be a doctor," I said. "Besides, ilang hours lang naman po ang Alaminos papuntang QC. Malapit lang naman din po ako."
Mom sighed, "Just remember that I'll always be a call away, okay?"
I smiled and nodded bago niya ako iniwan sa kuwarto ko.
I didn't really know what my life would be in QC. As much as possible, gusto ko rin namang mag-stay na lang sa Pangasinan. It's been my home for 18 long years, and suddenly just leaving for the sake of studying my premed makes me scared—pero, hindi rin naman talaga maiiwasan 'yun. Even the thought of living with other people in a dorm also scares me.
Nakakatakot naman kasi talaga.
Hindi naman kami gano'n kayaman. Middle class, pwede pa. My Dad's a Dentist, and my Mom's a housewife who handles a gourmet business. I wasn't really pampered to be exact, but I'd also get the things I'll ask for, sometimes—pero I knew it was still a privilege that not a lot has, and I always keep that in check.
But, I can't also let "privilege" hinder me from getting out of my box, too. Baka kasi sa sobrang protective rin sa'kin nila Mama dahil nag-iisang anak lang nila ako, kahit grumaduate ako, hindi ko pa rin alam kung paano talaga makitungo sa realidad ng mundo.
As much as I also want to stay, I can't always be the ignorant one.
"Nak, okay ka na ba?" I smiled and stood up before checking my room's surroundings. As much as ayaw ko namang umalis, kailangan ko rin namang harapin 'yung totoong mundo. I can't always live like the boxed person I've always been. Pakiramdam ko kasi, the more I distant from reality, the more I lose grasp from it. Iniisip ko na lang na kaya ko... na hindi ako pwedeng magpatalo. My relapses are always just around the corner, pero I can't always stop myself from trying to be a normal person just because.
Ang hirap pag pa-ulit-ulit 'yung relapse, pero mas mahirap kung habambuhay na lang din ako magpapakulong.
"Telly, your medicines should always be inside your bags, ha? Don't forget to bring them always," Mama said habang tinutulungan akong magbitbit ng gamit papunta sa sasakyan. "If your attacks get major, call Doctor Pidlaoan. Resident Psychiatrist siya sa hospital five minutes away from your school. He's my batchmate."
I nodded.
"Anak, I did not say yes to this for you to risk your health and your condition, ha? As much as I want you to stay, I also want you to experience life outside. Don't stress yourself too much," she said and kissed my forehead. "Say hi to your Tita Luz for me, okay?"
"Thank you, ma..." I hugged her tight and kissed her cheeks. "I won't let you down."
