1.1 The Chronicles of Us - Vice & Virtue

Chapter thirty-one

With two cinnamon roll-flavored Pop-Tarts on my plate—okay, I ate half of one in the kitchen—I crash on the lounge part of the L-shaped sectional. Tex won't be home for a couple more hours. I can slack and take the time for calling my best friend. Maggie doesn't know about my new living situation. For once, I'm the one who has a tale of adventure to share.

I disconnect my phone from the charger and press dial. She answers on the second ring, sounding elated. "Ellie! What's up, girl? Last time you texted me you were touring through the heartland. Where are you now?"

Paradise.

"Los Angeles, actually. I've been here for over a week."

"L.A?" She squeals with excitement. "That's so cool! Are you at a festival or something? You're still with that band, right?"

How to put this? "Not exactly, the tour has ended. I'm sort of staying with Tex. You know, the singer."

"No fucking way!" I have to hold the phone away from my ear because of her screaming. "Are you actually dating him? I thought you were taking a little walk on the wild side, but I never expected this. It's great, Ellie. Really."

"We're not dating. I mean, we are ... I think." I take a breath to stop my slightly nervous rambling and ignore the tiny prick of doubt. "He has a problem with the concept of it, but he's trying."

"Hmm." She stays silent for just a moment before she deep-dives into the emotional matter. "Do you love him?"

Is bathing in gummy-worms on my bucket list?

Absolutely.

"Oh, Maggs, you have no idea." I fall to my back and sigh in delight. "I'm so in love with him, I want to scream it from the rooftops."

She chuckles softly, clearly pleased for me. However, her voice grows quiet, wary even. "Does he ... love you, too?"

I wish I could say yes. I wish I knew for sure if my love is requited, if it ever will be. He cares for me and he wants me, but is that the same as love? Does the idea of not being with me cause him a sense of grieve? I surely feel that way when my mind decides to remind of the possibility of a future break-up.

Near future?

Distant future?

I sigh solemnly. "Honestly, I'm not sure. He definitely has feelings for me, but he hasn't spoken them yet. But when we're together it's—"

"Wait!" I jump a little from her sudden shouting. "Together as in sex? You finally did the deed?"

Tex and I have been so active and I feel so comfortable being with him like that, I completely forgot how my face used to turn bright scarlet whenever Maggie talked about her conquests. Her surprise is justified.

"It's so amazing! Why did you never tell me it would be so good?"

She huffs. "I did tell you. Many times."

True.

"I thought you were exaggerating."

Both our chuckles turn to giggles and then she finds her voice again. "Since I told you about some of my hook-ups, you owe me some juice." I don't know if she's sitting down, but it's not hard to imagine her inching to the edge of her seat. "Is he big?"

My instant reaction would be Y-E-S, but I lack a variety of material to analyze. He definitely feels big. I guess, experience is not needed to know the answer. After all, it's not rocket science. A relentless grin keeps tugging at my mouth. "I obviously can't compare, but he told me he's above average and I have no reason to doubt it."