This flashback chapter will contain a lot of serious issues (please check the warning in the intro). If you're not comfortable with it, you can skip to next chapter.
August 2013
Jieun's life after her break up consisted of waking up early, going to her agency to work on her album, attending her language lessons, then her vocal and dancing lessons. Some days she would run to different studios for small apparences on TV shows and variety programs. Other days she participated in festivals or military concerts in different cities around the country.
The hardest job was being the new MC of SBS's music show Inkigayo. Every week, she had to go through make up and hair in the beauty salon, learn her lines, memorize small part of each artist choreography then film all the show and host live interviews. Kang Ho Dong used his connection to help her get this highly sought position. Which also meant he pressured her a lot to be the perfect MC and gain more exposure to boost her career.
Everyday was harder than the one before.
Gone was her cheerfulness and her joy, it was replaced by sadness and exhaustion. The pain of breaking Jungkook's heart, the stress of being threatened by her own managers were taking a toll on her. Her heart, her mind and even her body were not in good condition but she still held on because she didn't have better options.
Sundays were her salvation as she could sleep for 10 hours and even take naps on her day off.
Since her trip to Lotte World and the stressful situation with Ho Dong, Jang Hoon and Jungkook, she kept throwing up almost every day. Inna told her it might be due to the stress but Jieun was afraid her bulimia crises were back. She ate more than necessary then vomited everything a few hours later.
The possibility of a pregnancy only presented in her mind when Inna made a comment one summer night. That night their air conditioner had a malfunction, their room was hot and humid, Jieun had to trade her usual pajamas to put a thin tank top and shorts. She climbed on a chair to fix the AC when Inna looked at her with round eyes and said :
" Jieunie...what I'm going to say may sound a little weird and you know well how I hate when people on comment on other people's body...but...your boobs seemed to have gained in size...and..from this angle...I can see right now that your belly has a slight curve...Jieunie, is there a possibility that you are..." Inna couldn't even finish the sentence, in fear of Jieun's reaction.
Jieun got down from the chair, her hands went all over her body to check if it was true, while her brain was trying to gather informations. Her best friend was right, despite her inability to keep food in her stomach, Jieun has indeed gained weight in her cheeks, chest and in her abdomen. Indeed, her period was months late but it didn't alarm her before as she had experienced amenorrhea in her training days. Irregular periods or no periods at all were sadly not unusual for female idols who undergoes an unhealthy diet, stress and overwork.
If she was honest to herself, her body has been showing signs for weeks but her mind was in total denial. Maybe her subconcsience was convincing herself it was bulimia, anxiety and exhaustion because otherwise the truth was unacceptable.
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This situation was absolutely nerve-wracking! Jieun paced around their room, waiting for the results of three pregnancy tests. Inna's sister bought them at the pharmacy and gave it to Inna when she went home yesterday. Thankfully her managers haven't taken their controlling behavior this far and didn't probe through the girl's bags.
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Lost child
Romance[ Kooku fanfic - completed] Jungkook was surprised when he saw Jieun's name appear on his phone screen. She usually never called him, as a matter fact her last text dated from months ago before the Golden Disk Awards. Despite their painful past and...
