The Hidden Princess: Finding Hope (Book One)

Chapter Thirty: Keep My Secret (e)

 "Men approaching," a voice called. Running to the watchtower, I quickly looked in the direction the men were coming from.

"Are they our men?" I asked the lookout.

He nodded. "You can see our flag at the front," he said.

We watched as they approached. It had been a month since the farmers market and this had become a regular occurrence. A group of twenty knights and four Dragons would head out. We would wait anxiously for their return and report on how far La Fray had moved.

"No," I whispered, straining my eyes. "Quick, have them lower the bridge. They have injured men," I said, noting the stretchers and slow pace.

Quickly descending the stairs I raced down to meet the men. Luke, Jonah, Daniel, and Micah had been the Dragons sent out. They were my closest friends besides my brothers. I stood to the side, watching as the men slowly came through. My eyes quickly scanned for familiar faces. My heart sank, as I realized the number returning was not the number that left. It wasn't until the end of the line that I saw Luke. I quickly slid through the men and up to Luke.

"Sam," he said, seeing me. His voice was different. He was here physically, but he hadn't fully come back. My eyes darted around.

"What happened?" I asked.

Luke guided me out of the way. "It was bad, Sam, we were facing one of La Fray's main crews. We lost twelve men, another six too injured to walk... three of those we aren't sure if they'll make it," he said, his voice cracking at each word.

Tears threatened my eyes. "No..." I said. "Your brothers? Where are they?" I was not sure if I could handle the answer. When the tears started falling from Luke's eyes I knew I couldn't.

"Daniel is in the wagon... he is in bad shape... he's one of the three..." Luke said, then closed his eyes and when he opened them the pain was evident. "Micah... Jonah... They saved us, but... they... they gave themselves," Luke said.

I shook my head. It couldn't be. I felt a hand come down on my shoulder. "None of us would be here without those two. As men, we must press on. It's up to us to make sure we end La Fray and stand firm for the women," one of the knights said.

Something snapped, uncaring of my surroundings, my feet carried me away. My eyes burned with tears. My body shook in pain. Stumbling, my legs gave out from under me and I collapsed. Sobs wracking my body. "No more! I can't take this anymore," I screamed my fingers digging into the ground as I tried to fight back the pain. "I'm not as strong as they think! My family was taken... my village... and now my friends! I can't take this anymore... I can't stand strong as a man... I'm just a girl," I whispered, my shoulders shaking.

"Sam..." I heard my name whispered. Head snapping up I turned to see Nikolai standing beside me. "You... your... a girl..." he said.

Frozen, I stared up at him. After a moment I slowly nodded. "Yes. I'm sorry. This was the only way, but I can't do it anymore. I don't have the strength to keep going when everyone expects me to be strong as a man," I said, letting my head drop back down.

"I knew there was something off," he said as he sat down beside me. "For now, this works in our favor. I've never been good comforting guys but girls, I've got that figured out," he said as he put his arms around me and pulled me close. "It's okay to feel lost when facing all that you have and it's okay to cry," he said.

I let myself break down. There was a comfort in his arms that made me feel safe to cry, to be me. After a bit, I sat up wiping my eyes. "Thank you. I'm sorry I lied to you," I said softly.