talks with jah

200 10 1
                                    

angel's pov

"what's going on?" i asked jahseh as soon as we stepped outside.

"i just need someone to talk to and you always tend to help me" he told her.

"well what's going on?" i intertwined our hands as i swung them "don't be shy now best friend" i told him causing him to smile.

"i just don't know what to do" he said as we walked down the streets swinging our hands.

"i knew something was wrong" i looked over at him "you just wanna get away from all of this right?" i asked him causing him to look up at me.

"yeah" he said lowly as he let out a sigh "it's just all so overwhelming. i love making music and making people feel not so alone. i love making them feel as if whatever they're going through so is someone else. i don't wanna stop making music but i feel so much pressure sometimes. at times i don't even wanna release a song because i think it's not good enough, or that they hold me to a higher standard than i see myself" he said as we sat down on the curb under a street light.

"just take a break" i said as he put his head on my lap "take some time off for you. the people that truly love and support you will be okay with it. they'll support and love that you're taking time for you. i know you never wanna disappoint them but you need time for you jahseh" i told him as i heard him sigh "it's gonna be okay, we'll all be here for you. you know no matter what i'll always support you. you're my best friend and you know i love you"

"i always feel better after talking to you, angel" he looked up at me "it sometimes feels as if you're the only person that truly understands me. at times i wonder what would happen if you and isaiah never met. it honestly scares me to think of a place where i don't have you in my life. i see you as a sister and it makes me so happy to know that i have you in my life. i love you so much angel" he reached up to grab a strand of my hair and play with it.

"i love you jahseh" i gave him a warm smile.

he let out a sigh as we closed his eyes. for weeks now i had known something was bothering him, but i also knew he didn't wanna talk about it. it feels good to know that now that he's ready he came to me. it makes me happy to know that he knows he can come to me when he needs someone to talk to.

there we sat with jahseh's head on my lap and my back against the street lamp post. we didn't talk or anything, all we did was sit there in silence. it was a comforting silence that was very much needed. jahseh needed it more though, he was constantly in a lot of stress. he was barely blowing up and everything he did was put under a microscope. so many people find out new ways to "cancel" him. at one point he posted a picture of us and people immediately attacked him asking what kind of friend he was for hooking up with me. i immediately went to social media to say he was my brother and i was in love with isaiah. even then to this day people still get on him about that.

"ready to go home now?" i asked him.

"yeah" he said

he got off my lap and put his hand out for me to grab. i got up and we made our way back to the house. we cracked a few jokes here and there as we kept pushing each other.

"we're home" i yelled as i saw all the guys sitting on the couch.

"starr" peep ran over to me "i missed you" he said picking me up.

"i missed you åhr" i said laughing as he put me down.

"hi baby" isaiah walked over to me smiling.

"hi baby" i looked up at him.

"gross" tracy and ski said looking away.

"oh shut up" isaiah and i said at the same time.

"we're gonna go watch the boondocks" i told them.

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just a short chapter
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