Family Business

24.

Two Weeks. It's been two weeks since James has been in a coma. Doctors had said he was supposed to wake up the day after the incident, but it seemed to only be getting worse and worse as time grew on. 

Natasha grieved as any parent did. She sat in Sarah's room and cried, she sat in James's hospital room and cried, and you drank. A lot. Steve was no better. He probably destroyed over a hundred punching bags, he drank all of the Asgardian med that Thor left him a while ago. He held his wife in bed, not letting her go, afraid that she too would disappear. They were slowly becoming shells of their former selves. 

Everyone on the team, minus Tony and Thor, would stop by and to get the couple more groceries,  bring them stuff they asked for, which wasn't really a lot, and would simply be there for the parents. 

Maria and Clint's were sitting with Natasha outside their house, Sam was inside talking to Steve. It was quiet, there weren't any conversations happening, their presence was all they needed. But when they did talk, it made Natasha feel that much better. 

"Maria, Clint?" Natasha finally spoke. 

"Yeah?" Maria asked. 

"You ever want the world to stop? The voices in your head to shut up? Has it ever been so apparent that the pain isn't going to go away any time soon that you so desperately want to do anything to stop it?" 

"You know we do Nat," Clint said softly. "You should be focusing on you right now." 

"How can I do that when my son is still in the hospital?" She asked. 

"How are you doing? Maybe talking about everything isn't so bad." Maria said. 

"I don't know what to talk about." She admitted. "It's like all my thoughts have been locked away and all I'm left with is these voices that are just clawing and pushing me down." Her friends looked at her. "You can stop looking at me at like that. I am not suicidal." 

"We never said you were," Maria pointed out. 

"But you're looking at me like you think I wanna kill myself."  She sighed. "I wouldn't do that. I can't do that to Steve." 

"That's good. At least you know that." Clint said. "Nat you don't have to rush this, you take the time you need. No one is expecting you to be fine right afterward." 

"I want to be fine. I don't want to keep going like this. It feels like I am trapped in an endless cycle of pain." 

"Have you talked with Steve?" 

"We talk every day." 

"I mean really talk," Clint corrected. "Not asking if you want a cup of water, but talk about your feelings." 

"No." She admitted, "What's there even left for us to talk about?" 

"Maybe you guys just need to realize that you're going through the same thing, it can help to talk with him," Maria said. It wasn't like Steve and Natasha were hiding from each other, it's just the only time they felt decently okay was when they were in each other's arms. They didn't want to ruin that feeling. 

Before Maria could say anything, her phone rang, a frown appearing on her face as she listened to the person who called her. 
"Okay, I'll be right there." Maria sighed hanging up. Clint looked over at her and was about to ask her what's wrong when his phone rang as well. He raised an eyebrow as well and Maria shook her head in annoyance. 

"Hello?" He said. "Yes this is him... you're joking, okay, I'll be right there." 

"Where are you guys going?" Natasha asked when they both stood.