Chapter 25

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بڑا تڑپے ہیں، دیتے ہیں دہائی
دیتے ہیں دہائی، دیتے ہیں دہائی۔۔۔۔۔۔۔
ایسے بھکرے ہیں، سمجھ نہ آئی
سمجھ نہ آئی، سمجھ نہ آئی۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔
ہائے۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔
_______________________________________

Haveli. Living here, surrounded by so many people. It became easy to smile, to laugh and to be just happy. Chatting while eating dinner or lunch. These small things lifted my mood.

I decided to live in haveli. No one raised their voice against my decision. Mummy only asked Taya Ami to take care of me in this condition which she have been doing very nicely by giving me yahne at evening.

At every evening, With the bowl of yahne at table waiting to be finished. I would look at Taya ami with pout to not make me eat it anynore but she would only glare at me while Sana would just giggle at my expense. Sometimes Hassam joined her too and both of them laughed together.

Hassam and Sana both became ne my support these days. Hassam would get me anything that I wanted to eat most of the times. Sana never even minded. Sometimes it felt like that they both understood somethings even if they didn't verbally express it.

I was somehow very grateful for this support. Whenever was my checkup. Sana would be there to accompny me. It was no different this time.

According to my doctor, Everything was normal. Hearing the heartbeat of my son. It never felt new. It always felt unique and so beautiful. Like something that I couldn't ever get tired of.

Sitting in droving car. These months just felt like those houses which were passing as I moved forward. I was at the last months of my pregnancy. Then my son would be in this world with me. I was awaiting for the moment when I could hold him in my arms. Tuck him against my chest feel that incredible feeling. Sometime it felt like. I would close my eyes and then in next minute, he would be here, in my arms.

◾◾◾◾◾◾◾◾◾◾◾

Mummy was sitting with me in my room, showing me the clothes and things that she bought for the baby. We were laughing abd smiling. I don't what happened at the next moments that the tears started sliding down her cheeks.

I placed my hand over her. "Are you okay?"

She smiled as she wiped her cheeks. "Jahan yaad agaye. (I remembered Jahan.)

I froze for a second and then looked away. The mention of his name reminded me of many bitter things.

"Apko unki kami mehsoon ni hote. (Don't you feel his absence. )"

Her words replayed a memory in my mind. The only time that I felt like, I needed him with me. No actually, I craved for him to be here with me. When I woke up at night in pain with blood on my sheets. My good fortune was that Sara was sleeping with me that night. She immediately took me to hospital and I was saved from having an miscarriage.

After wards, everyone was particular of taking care of me. They took care of my medicines and food making sure that my B.P remained on normal. That day was the only and last time that the need to have him near arose inside me.

"Naraz haina un sae. Wo guilty hai bohat ....... (You are upset with him. He is very guilty.......)

She continued speaking pulling ne out of the memory. The memory which was more like a nigtmare.

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