addiction - draco malfoy

sixteen

the next day emma and lily were already gone as i woke up, so i completed my morning routine as normal. wake up, pee, snort a line, shower, get dressed. easy. sticking to only snorting one line was the hard part though, it fed my addiction, but it wasn't enough to make me feel high anymore. i just didn't feel so low. i couldn't take anymore than that though, for one i couldn't ration my supply that i was steaming from draco to two a day. secondly, emma would have to make herself notice if i came down to breakfast off my face.

i sat on the toilet seat as i waited for the shower to heat up, cursing the slow hot water system here. then i felt it again in my hand, the feeling of actual energy rushing around inside of me. i grinned, reaching out and pressing my hand against the boiling system in the bathroom. as if on command, the heaters whistled, starting to boil. maybe i wasn't crazy after all. somehow knowing i was a freak of nature, felt better than being delusional. i could keep this to myself, and i couldn't really be a weirdo for having some kind of different power if nobody knew about it. it realised i felt a knot in my stomach as the feeling of power started to fade, kind of similar to what i felt on a high.

the way most of me saw it was, if nobody knew about this, it wasn't going to effect me. there was no reason for it to have suddenly only started now, i'd obviously been able to do it my whole life, i just hadn't known about it. so i'd just, go back to not knowing about it. a different part of me however, was morbidly curious, and a little bit proud too. it was like i was finally special, finally able to do something that nobody else could. i wanted to experiment with it, to show off what i could do. only i didn't know what i could do. if nobody saw me, i don't suppose it could do much harm to work out how far i could push it.

i smiled to myself in spite of everything, focusing my energy on the shower water and laughing out of sheer disbelief as the water parted down the middle. i wanted to tell emma, but i felt too bad to tell emma without telling lily, and if you told lily something there was no guarantee it would be kept quiet. she wouldn't do it on purpose, but it would slip out one way or another.

i heard someone get back to the dorm, and figured that was enough, stepping in the shower and letting the water flow over me. emma or lily would probably come in the bathroom to see how i was, and while we had no problem seeing each other naked after years of friendship, i don't think they would react well to be somehow controlling things with my brain.

nobody came in though, and when i walked back into my room i found it empty. i was a little creeped out, even more so when i saw a note waiting for me on my bed. i sighed, snatching it up to read before i over thought it.

elizabeth,
you promised me a date, an entire day ago, and we still haven't been. it's a long time to be without you elizabeth i won't lie, but i've just about managed to get by, even though there's been a distinct lack of wit, charm and good looks in my life. i've planned our date, meet me in the library in an hour.
cedric.

i laughed out loud, pocketing the letter and hurrying to get dressed. i was kind of nervous to meet him, which was something i didn't expect. boys rarely made me uncomfortable, but for some reason the idea of having to think of what to say around cedric set me on edge. i finished up, realising i wasn't going to have time to do anything to my makeup apart from a quick bout of chapstick as i walked. it was annoying, but at least it wasn't a bad skin day.

i spotted him before he spotted me, leaning against the library door in an oversized t shirt and jeans. it was weird, seeing him out of uniform. i'd seen him out of uniform at the party that time, but the drugs i'd done after had kind of blurred my memory. it was weird, but it was nice. he looked up, grinning as he saw me. 'hey' i called.
'hi' he smiled, wrapping me in a quick hug. we started walking, and i attempted to ask where we were going. he slipped his hand into mine, giving me a look that told me not to ask anymore. i noticed this time, unlike the other times we'd spoke, i felt no butterflies. it was like i had just woke up this morning and turned on the charm, flirting coming easily to me. i'd snorted an extra line before i'd come to meet him, so i put it down to that.