addiction - draco malfoy

fourty

i only had one single pain tablet left in my drawer. i'd been saving it, but i needed the extra aid now if i wanted this compulsion to work. anyway, if this worked the way i hoped, i wouldn't have to worry about having used my last one. emma and lily were gone right now, i had no idea where, but it meant i had the dorm to myself. i crushed up the tablet, looking at the feeble amount of powder it made. i doubted it would work here. pain medication had never been strong enough to give me a buzz, more just kind of a dull sense of ignorance. almost like there was a fog surrounding my brain. that was using several tablets at once. one tablet would probably be unnoticeable. still, i had to try. i didn't need it to use the compulsion anyway, it just increased the strength of it. it was more a safety net, incase anything went wrong.

i leant down, barely even breathing before it was all gone. i barely felt a buzz, but at least i felt something. i felt confident, which was apparently part of the natural charm that came with spirit use. it wasn't much, but maybe it was a sign that i was somewhat connected to the magic again. i'd take what i could get.

i stuffed my shoes on, hurrying to find him before the magic wore off. i made my way back up the slytherin boys stairs, pausing in front of the door. i hadn't been here for weeks. i sighed, pushing the door open. 'elizabeth?' draco asked, walking over to the door to see me, his brow furrowed. 'what are you doing here?'.
'i'm not here to see you' i said quickly. it was kind of harsh, but i needed to get on with it before the buzz wore off. blaise was sat on the bed on the other side of the dorm, and he looked up as he heard this. thankfully, crabbe and goyle weren't in here. i don't know where they were, but it was one last complication.

'draco, can you give us a minute please?' i asked.
'what?' he blinked 'no. i'm not leaving the dorm so you can sleep with my friend'. i almost blurted out that he was being stupid, because blaise was gay, but i caught myself. that wasn't my place to say.

kind of like it wasn't draco's place to say to cedric that you had kissed him.

'draco' i hissed 'get out before i actually declaw you with a pair of tweezers'. he blinked again, looking between me and blaise. 'fine' he huffed, turning and slamming out the dorm.

'what do you want?' blaise asked bluntly 'you're not making it any easier on draco you know. coming to the dorm and parading yourself in front of him'. i almost laughed then. 'i'm not making it any easier on draco? this is all his fault'.
'elizabeth. what do you want?'.
'drugs'. okay. shoot. i wasn't meant to blurt it out like that. 'no' he said bluntly 'is that all?'.
'can i have drugs, please?'. that wasn't right either. it had to be a command. 'elizabeth i told you ages ago. i'm not dealing to you anymore'.
'blaise. listen to me'. eye contact. it hadn't said, but i felt like that was important. 'give me drugs'.

he froze for a minute, as if thinking. 'okay' he said, sniffing, two minutes. he stood up, crouching down and pulling a box out from underneath his bed. 'how much?'.
'all of it' i said quickly, turning and looking back at the door. this was taking longer than it should have. if we weren't careful, someone might come back soon. or even worse, the magic might wear off. i don't know what would happen to the compulsion if i lost the power to hold it. 'here' he passed me the draw and i quickly stuffed it into my pockets. i had forgotten how big of a dealer blaise was around here. there was everything in this draw. weed, md, cocaine, ecstasy, acid and other unlabelled tablets i didn't even recognise.

'okay' i paused 'now you're going to forget this conversation. if anyone asks, we were just talking about a homework assignment'.
'a homework assignment' nodded blaise 'okay'.
'okay' i agreed, turning to leave. i felt almost bad. i knew he'd been cut up for months about being the one that had gotten me addicted to drugs, and the one who had supplied me for my overdose. but instead of letting him forgive himself for that, i'd forced him to give me more.

there wasn't time to mull over that now. i'd done it. i'd got the drugs. enough to last me a lifetime. suddenly, the ache i'd felt earlier over draco and cedric didn't seem to hurt anymore.