gone. (draco malfoy)

59 - fixing us

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Y/n POV✨
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It had been two weeks since that night.

Draco hasn't written either of us back.

Ryder and I have barely spoken to each other since the incident.

The only people I've been talking to are Blaise and Luna. It's always nice being in their company, but I swear those two are all over each other and make me look like a lonely third wheel.

I left the dorm after Ryder and I wrote the note and didn't return for another week when the sheets were changed by the cleaners. I didn't want to be in those sheets until they were cleaned.

I didn't really know how to feel about the whole situation. It was all too confusing and I got a headache every time I tried to think about it.

I was sitting on Draco's bed, rambling through the mess of letters now scattered all over his floor when a faint knock was on the door.

"Y/n, I know you're in there...please let me in."

I sighed knowing that I haven't talked to Ryder since that day and slowly opened the door to reveal an exhausted looking Ryder.

His eyes were glossed over and bloodshot and his bags were deep and dark. He had been crying.

"I-I'm such a fuck up." He began to choke out as a tear fell down his cheek, "I never meant for it to happen I swear. I don't know what I was thinking. I was just lonely and I never should of used you like that..."

"I'm disgusting." He sobbed as I took a step back, allowing him to enter the dorm.

My eyes began to water at the sight in front of me, yet no words could come out.

"I care about you Y/n and I hate that I treated you that way.." He cried as he looked at me seriously.

His hands were shaking and I could tell how upset he was over this.

"I care about you too, Ryder." I sighed, not knowing how I could fix this. "That's why I forgive-"

"Please don't forgive me." He cut me off surprisingly and I looked at him wide eyed.

What?

"Even though I wish that we could go back to being best friends again, I'm disgusted with myself and I can't allow you to forgive me. I fucked up badly and I can't let you forgive me...not yet," He cried as he looked at me with sorrowful eyes, "I just wanted you to know that I am terribly sorry and that I hope to one day make up for all of this."

I was crying now too as I ran up to him and threw my arms around him.

It's crazy how one night can ruin everything. Friendships. Relationships.

We wept in each other's arms for a few minutes until I slowly pulled away to look him in the eye.

"I really am sorry." he sighed, looking at me defeatedly.

"I know." I gave him a weak smile and he returned it.

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