Cigarettes and Hickies [n.h]

vingt-six

Sunlight sneaked through the cigarette-burned hole on the curtain and stretched itself across the two bodies sleeping on the bed and waking them from their soundless slumber. After last night's events crashed their way into Ocean's memory, the girl couldn't help but find a pleasant smile forming upon her lips. Turning to the other side, she found herself looking at Niall's deep blue eyes inside the small cocoon he had created with his arms around her. 

The girl with silvery-blue hair grinned up at him, but found that the Irishman wasn't returning the same joyful spirit. His eyes were thoughtful as he looked at her and his lips were pursed into a thin line. Upon deciding that she couldn't handle not knowing the reason behind the look, she therefore decided to ask him quite bluntly what was wrong. 

"Please don't play games with me anymore." He returned the same blunt tone and looked at her firmly. The schemes and mind games he had been victim of, were suddenly hanging heavily in his mind and he dreaded the idea that this was one of them; especially after seeing how mysterious the girl can be. However, he really hoped it wasn't, as the girl was also beginning to change with him. He was seeing a different side to her, and she had actually stated last night that she wanted him. Niall simply hoped he wasn't being played. 

There was a small knowing smile on Ocean's part as she looked at him and absorbed the words. She knew what he meant. However, rather than answering him, she rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. After a long sigh, she finally answered him with her own statement. 

"Don't fall in love with me Niall," Her eyes were glued to the ceiling, but her tone was slightly gentler. "I'm not good for you."

"Don't tell me who I can and can't fall in love with, Ocean." Niall replied sternly, resting his weight on one arm as he turned to look at the girl, "And don't ever say ya're not good enough."

He sighed slgihtly angry that she had told him that, he turned and fell back against the pillow again and stared at ceiling. 

"Why would ya even say tha'?" He asked frustratedly, not wanting to dwell on his confusion any longer.

"Because I know you won't like the person that I truly am." 

"Sure, ya have your flaws and are a righ' pain in the arse," he winked at Ocean as she shot him a daggered look before adding, "but, that's wha' makes ya different. Your difference is special, Ocean. And if it's your past ya're worried about, I honestly don't care. I don't care about it a' all. Everyone's go' their demons, yeah? But it's the ones ya feed that make the difference."

Her eyes softened as they stared at the popstar for a long moment. She was changing, and she was feeling it on every fibre of her body. Her heart was beating, and her cheeks were reddening, and it was all because of this boy. 

And more importantly, she was beginning to care for the lad. She had realised this some time ago, especially when she would seek him out and make him chase after her. However, it was in this moment that Ocean was finally able to confront the fact in her head. And it was because she cared that she knew that a person like her, wasn't made for a gentle soul like his. Yet, she still didn't want to lose him. 

So, the girl with silvery-blue hair, took a breath and decided to tell her story. Make Niall see why she was saying the things that she was saying. Perhaps after having heard her story, he would listen to her. 

And that small teetering thought scared her. 

But still, the words fell from her lips.

"I was fifteen and in boarding school. Growing up, I was quite rebellious and so that's the reason I was sent there in the first place, as well as to become a lady." Her eyes rolled as she said the word and Niall merely scoffed but kept quiet. He was grateful for this moment, he knew she was opening up to him again and he also knew it was hard for her to do so, so it was best not to ruin the moment. "Anyway, with time I managed to find a way to sneak out of the school and I used to wander around town for hours on end. And so this one time, this guy approached me when I was smoking the last of the cigarette butt I had found on the floor that day, as I obviously couldn't buy my own, and told me that he could give me something -and I quote- that would bring the smile back to my beautiful face.