s t r a y k i d s: reactions&imagines

five years: felix

To: my love. . . Y/N

Five years. One thousand eight hundred and twenty five days. Forty-three thousand and eight hundred hours. This is how long I've been waiting for you. I have been waiting five years, five years for you to wake up. Five years to hear your voice, to see you smile, to hear you laugh. Five years for you to punch my arm after I tease you about your crush.

(You really need to step up your game)

Everyday I visit you. I stay with you, day and night.  I tuck your hand in after it falls out of the hospital blanket. I open the curtains in your bland hospital room. I place fresh sunflowers on the bedside table.

They're still your favorite, right? I hope so.

Did I ever tell you how much you remind me of sunflowers. I know you're not that big of a fan of the color yellow. It's funny since, you wear it so well. That smile of yours, brightens the rooms you walk into. Your beauty marks creating a map of where to kiss. Your beauty marks look like the seeds in the flower.

Do you remember our sophomore summer vacation?

I don't know why but, you insisted on coming with me to Australia. You told me that you didn't know either, that you were bored of Seoul and wanted to go somewhere "new".

Funny, what was new to you was old to me. I gave in and brought you along. You stayed with me and my family. I wasn't expecting for it to go that way. I would have never thought that you would get along with my parents so well. You got along with them so much that they thought we were dating. The both of us denied it.

I wish we were.

The last day before we had to go back was my favorite. I mean, the whole vacation was my favorite. Everyday with you is my favorite. I can remember that day as if it was yesterday. You kept asking where we were going and how long/when would we be there.

I replied with, "it's a surprise, love".

I called you that on a normal basis but, I think that was the first time I saw you blush from it. Do you feel the same way I do?

You eventually stopped asking me. We walked for a while, occasionally stopping at stores and fooling around.

(Yeah, I don't think the owner is going to let us back in)

Anyways, I gave you a blindfold to wear. You were sceptical but, you put it on and I was your eyes. I led you into a field of your favorite flowers. I can vividly remember the way your eyes lit up when the blindfold came off. Your eyes. your beautiful, loveable, sweet eyes. I can spend all day lost in them and I would not mind one bit. Your eyes lit up like a thousand candles, a million fireflies. You spun around in a circle, jumping up and down smiling like a kid in a candy store.

Your laughter and giggles filled my ears as if it was music. I couldn't help myself but smile at you. There was so much more that I wanted to do but, I didn't want to ruin the moment.

You stopped your little dance and looked right at me. Then, you walked to me and hugged me. We hugged, is it weird to say that I didn't want to let go? I did, you held onto my hands. That's when you leaned forward and kissed my cheek.

I told myself I would "never" wash that cheek, I didn't, not for a while.

"Thank you, Felix" is what you said.

Y/N, wake up. Please, wake up. I can't stand not being able to talk to you like before. I can't stand seeing you in an emotionless coma. I can't stand it. Five years. Five years you've missed. You missed our freshman seminar at college. The college we both promised each other that we would attend together. You missed graduation. You missed 3RACHA.

Yeah, Chan, Jisung, and Changbin made their debut as 3RACHA. They just came back from a tour. Y/N, please, open your eyes. Please, wake up. I still have so much to tell you. WE still have so many things to do. I still haven't told you something that I so badly want to tell you. . . I love you. I admit it, I am utterly, differently, fully in love with you. So, please wake up. . You told me that you wanted to go to...

<<<><><>>

"Sunshine" I hear a weak voice call my name.

I stop writing, my mind trying to understand what I just heard. Y/N only called me that. I slowly look up from my notebook. I can't believe it. I drop my pen, my heart drops. I can feel my eyes watering, slightly blurring my vision. I stand up from the bench under the tree. Under the tree that Y/N and I first met.

"Is it really you? Y/N?" I ask, her/his/their eyes looking me up and down.

She/He/They still have/has the hospital gown on. Nothing but slippers and a pullover keeping her/him/them warm. Her/His/Their hair is slightly messy, but still so beautiful/handsome.

"Is it you? Felix?" She/He/They ask, a wondering look painted on her/his/their face.

"Yes, it's me. Felix," I tell Y/N.

"I'm so sorry," She/He/They say, tears beginning to fall.

I feel like someone just put a knife in my heart. It hurts when I see Y/N cry. It's my weakness. She/He/They are/is my weakness.

"I'm so sorry," Y/N repeats.

I shush her/him/them and pull her/him/them into my arms. I missed this. I missed being able to hold her/him/them. I missed actually being able to hold Y/N not just her/his/their hand. Physically holding her/him/them in my arms.

"There's nothing to be sorry about," I reassure Y/N, stroking her/his/their hair.

I try and hold back my tears, I fail. I can't, it's been too long. Y/N sniffles and grabs onto me, I hold her/him/them tighter. This time I am never letting her/him/them go.

"Never again am I letting you go," I say, placing a kiss on the top of her/his/their head.

A/N: Hello! I hope you liked this imagine/oneshot. If you can vote that'd be greatly appreciated. Alright, have a nice day or night, stay safe and healthy luvs<3

P.S.- remember you are loved, and if anyone says other wise I will take their kneecaps<3