Chapter 35

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It knocks at the door.
"Harry? I just wanted to say that I'm back now. Can I come in?"
Louis voice hurts Harry even more.

He doesn't want Louis to come in, not now. Louis decided to stay with Eleanor and that means he decided against Harry.

Also Harry doesn't wanna let Louis in because his wrist is still red and bleeding. Even though he can't feel the pain because he's callous at the moment, it doesn't mean that Louis' behaviour doesn't hurt him.

"Harry. Please, let me inside. I'm sorry  okay? But please open the fire anders talk. I have something to tell you"
He's wrong. Harry absolutely knows that Louis isn't sorry over all. He doesn't even know what he did wrong. And that's the problem.

Louis doesn't notice how he makes Harry feel. Harry feels like a needless peace of shit.

"Please! Harry you can't just lock yourself and don't answer. That's not fair"

Oh wow, THIS isn't fair? Louis really doesn't notice anything. He doesn't notice that he hurts Harry and that he makes Harry feel replaced by Eleanor. He doesn't even know that Harry sometimes doesn't wanna live anymore.

Harry keeps quiet. He needs some time. And Louis has to savvy this.

"Okay. I got it. You don't wanna talk to me. Fine than I'm going to leave. But you are so unfair Harry! I do this whole shit for you, for us and you just act like I did something wrong. I don't understand you"
Louis is crying. He definitely does, Harry can hear his shivering voice.

Louis' words hurt. He gives Harry the guilt for this whole thing and that's shit.

"Louis, just leave. I don't wanna talk to you right now, I need a nap. Just stop giving me the guilt okay? We can talk kalter but not now"
And with those words, Harry lays down on his bed and tries to ignore Louis.

The last thing he can hear is Louis' footsteps leaving.

Harry will talk to Louis later and tell him what he thinks about this while "Eleanor-Thing".
He will also tell him that he can't handle the pressure and feeling to get replaced anymore.

Louis will have to decide. Harry's health or Simons satisfaction.
And sadly, Harry has a presentiment of what Louis will say.

The last thing Harry knows is, that there is no way pout. No matter what Louis will decide, everything would be unfair.

Then, after many troubled months, Harry falls into a deep sleep.

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