10.4 - Mai

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Mai had spent the day helping Zuko prepare his surprise party for Azula. It had been strange when he'd shown up on her doorstep a few days ago, begging her to come, if not for Azula, for him.

She'd agreed immediately, and had been looking forward to spending more time with him, as well as seeing Azula continue to earn her friendship with Mai back. Azula had already gifted her a beautiful new set of knives, given Tom-Tom new toys and had bought flowers from their shop every week. Originally Mai had wanted to see her suffer for what she'd done, but after seeing how Azula actually tried...actually wanted to be her friend... 

Mai was definitely feeling better about her now, and realised that she was ready to take that step, to try again. She wasn't sure what a friendship with Azula would even look like, but Mai wasn't afraid to try, especially if Zuko was serious about...being together.

This morning guards had been sent to clear the beach, do a security check and set up a tent for them to eat and rest in. Mai sat in there now with Kiyi and Tom-Tom, teaching them Pai Sho. Neither of them were very good, but they liked the little pieces.

"There you are Kiyi, we've been looking all over for you," Ursa said from behind them. She wasn't exactly dressed in swimwear, but she did wear a lighter beach dress.

Mai nodded courteously, "I was teaching her Pai Sho, she's really coming along." Kiyi beamed at her and Mai grinned back.

"Actually, Mai? I was hoping I could speak with you...alone if you could."

Mai's guard instantly went up, "Of course."

She stood, and followed Ursa out to the mouth of the tent, where a shade cloth had been set up to keep the hot sun at bay.

Ursa faced her, and Mai was struck by the fact that she was taller than her now, "I understand that you and Zuko have been in a relationship in the past, and that it didn't exactly work out. Forgive me for being so forward but... As much as I like you dear, I want the best for him, and I want to make sure you're it. Tell me how you feel about the whole thing. Why didn't it work out in the past, why will it work now?"

Mai shoved down her panic, her mask of cool indifference sliding into place. Growing up, talking about how she felt had always been a trap. No one wanted to know how you really felt, they wanted to know that you felt how they wanted you to feel. If you didn't feel the 'right' way you got into trouble. Talking about feelings had always been a big no-no.

But Zuko had always encouraged her to tell him how she felt, and she'd never had to hide anything around him. If she wanted to be with him, she had to pass this test too.

Mai took a steadying breath and began, "I suppose...after the war, we were both in a bad place. My family was horrified that I'd betrayed Azula, betrayed the nation. I was a disgrace. Zuko had just taken up the throne and he was facing opposition from all sides. He'd had to fight his father and his sister, and lock them both up. He was unbelievably stressed, and I was too. My father was still trying to put Ozai back on the throne and I had all my own issues. We couldn't be there for each other in the ways we needed. So, we took a break. Took time to get ourselves together. After a while, I got my life back into order, and I realised that I missed him. A lot."

Ursa listened patiently, and Mai went on, "Even though his father was the worst, and you left when he was young, Zuko was always kind, just and honourable. He was so hurt after his Agni Kai with his father, his banishment. Yet, he grew past it, to become one of the most caring people I've ever met. He loves his friends so much, and he's grown so much as Fire Lord. I feel..." Mai looked up at Ursa, who nodded for her to go on.

"I feel good when I'm around him. I love how he treats me, as someone who deserves to be heard. He listens and he takes my advice on board. I... I dated a few different boys while we were apart, but none of them seemed right. It felt like each time I dated them, it cemented what I really wanted. And that was–"

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