𝐋𝐮𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐚 𝐌𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐡𝐲𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐬 ʰʸᵘᶰᶜʰᵃᶰ

✿

On my way way to the hospital I went through all the possible scenarios that could possibly happen as soon as I would arrive, my pulse tried to kill me and I was sweating even though I felt freezing cold. I was scared.

This feeling of being scared as in when the cold around you is threatening to swallow you whole, with all your skin and bones, making you sweat and shiver in anxiety. When your heart is racing uncontrollably and there is no way to calm it down. When you have tears in your eyes, not enough to make them spill, yet just enough to take your sight. When you are constantly out of breath and every other inhale almost tears your lungs apart. When just this one thought is running up and down inside your head, driving you crazy and just waiting to become terrifying and brutal reality. 

That's exactly how it felt. 

I wanted to scream.

"Chan you're here!"

Just as I entered the hallway to Hyunjin's room I saw Seungmin and the doctor standing in front of his door, Seungmin looking me up and down.

"Dear Lord, Chan are you okay? You're so pale ..." Seungmin went up to me, putting a hand on my shoulder to check what was wrong.

"Mr. Bang, I have news for you." The doctor looked at me, the same kind of worry in his eyes as I found in Seungmin's.

"What happened? Did he.." I couldn't get beyond a whisper, my lungs tried to take in as much air as possible, the sharp inhales almost ripped my throat open.

Both of them looked at me in disbelief.

"Wait- you thought he died?" As if genuinely waiting for an answer, Seungmin stared at me for a second before the doctor spoke up. "We took good care of him and Mr. Hwang was never in any kind of danger after he got here. Don't worry. He's doing really good at the moment."

And just like that, all the bad thoughts left my mind. All the weight fell off my shoulders and the air around me seemed to become warmer with every split second that passed. I was finally able to exhale.

"Oh ..." The feeling of being safe felt so strange all of a sudden, I had to twitch a few times. It felt unreal for a second however I was happy to know that Hyunjin was doing alright. "So ... what happened then?"

The doctor took a step towards me looking down to the clipboard he was holding in his hand. "I wanted to inform you that Hyunjin went through a couple surgeries after his accident and we were able to get him back to a very good condition. In addition, we were successful as we tried restoring his hearing, so he is in fact able to hear."

"Wait ... he can hear?" 

Seungmin looked at me with a soft smile, reassuringly moving his hand to my shoulder. 

"Indeed. You can compare his hearing ability at the moment to what it feels like to be underwater. It's going to take a while until there is no sound suppression anymore, but he will be able to hear like everyone else." I took a look at the clipboard as the doctor handed it to me to show me the results of Hyunjin's last surgery. 

"Oh ... and also he wants to see you. That's why I asked Mr. Kim to contact you."

It took me a moment to realize what he said, before I finally got what was going on. I was happy ... but at the same time I wasn't ready. I really didn't know if I could walk up to Hyunjin just like that. He got into this accident because of me after all. If I wouldn't have tried to ignore him back then, all this wouldn't have happened.

"Don't you want to see him as well, Chan?"

Seungmin looked at me, a slight bit confused as to why I was still looking at the clipboard instead of entering Hyunjin's room. It made me look up to the door and think for a few second.