metanoia《twilight oc》

crossroads

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked at a loss for words. How did Bella even know where I lived? Sure, she knew my university, but how did she get my specific address? Oh god, what was Edward gonna do to me if he found out?

Bella stumbled over her words. "I-Uh...I needed to make sure it was all real. I'm sorry. I should go."

She turned to leave, but I pulled her back, feeling guilty for snapping at her. I wrapped my arms around her gently, hugging her.

She was stiff for a moment before she returned the hug.

"You don't have to go, come in. I was just surprised. I'm sorry for being so rude." I motioned for her to enter my apartment, opening the door further and stepping aside.

She smiled. "I'm sorry for coming over so suddenly. I didn't have your number and I had your address from when you had your show. I figured you would still be here." Bella explained as she walked into the living room.

I sat down on the couch and she followed suit.

"What did you mean you needed to make sure it was real?" I questioned, my concern growing as I turned her words over in my mind.

"Um, I've been struggling since you all left."

I reached for her hand to hold in consolation. She glanced at it, but didn't refuse the action.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I would have come to check on you, but I promised Edward I wouldn't."

She visibly flinched at the mention of his named, but brushed it off.

"You don't have to be sorry, I don't blame you and you don't owe me anything. It's just...I felt like I was going crazy. The nightmares never stopped and he really meant it when he said it would be as though we had never met. Everything, every single trace of you all is gone. I needed to make sure it wasn't all some elaborate dream I had." Bella said.

I nodded in understanding. "Well now that you know it's not, I can come visit. If you'd like of course."

Bella was quick to nod her head, "yes, I want you to. Please. You don't need to feel obligated to, of course, but it would be nice."

I grinned at her enthusiasm. "Well, what else have you been up to?"

I removed my hand from hers and leaned back on the couch, relaxing a bit.

"Honestly, nothing. Recently I was hanging out with Jacob Black, but that's over now. I honestly don't know why."

"Hm? What do you mean?"

"We were repairing some motorcycles together and everything was great. Perfect, if I'm being honest...but a couple days ago everything changed and I have no idea why. He won't pick up the phone. We went to the movies with another friend of mine from school and he got sick. I haven't seen him since."

"Just out of the blue like that? What the heck is his problem. I can beat him up if you'd like," I replied, trying to lighten the air.

Bella laughed. "No need , I'm waiting another week before I take action. I'm worried. He mentioned something about an older guy named Sam pressuring him into being in a gang with him or something. I'm scared he got mixed up in it."

The names she spoke were familiar to me from the stories Edward told me about the shifters, but I thought it was better to stay quiet than break their treaty.

"Well say the word and I'll be there to break some noses." I joked.

She smiled warmly at the offer, "thank you."

The was a short silence before Bella broke it, "enough about me how have you been?"

I hesitated before answering, "I'm doing okay, a bit lonely, but I have my friends here and school to keep me busy. It's just the nights that are long."

"Oh yeah, no sleeping."

I nodded in confirmation.

"Yeah, I miss them, but it's not my place to question their leaving," I said.

"...Have you heard from them?"

"Yeah, once, back in October. They didn't say much, they were just checking in. I haven't heard from him though, if that's what you're wondering. Just Alice."

Her eyes widened at my assumption and she looked down, playing with her hands on the lap nervously.

"He wants you to live your life, Bella. To move on and be happy." I spoke softly.

She looked up again.

"I know, but it's so hard to just forget everything and move on as though none of it happened. I have a new lens on the world that I can't just ignore."

"And you don't need to," I reassured. "You're just more aware of everything that's out there. I think everything happens for a reason and if you and him are meant to be it will happen eventually. You can't dwell on the past and beat yourself up over something that you can't change."

Her lip twitched a bit as though she was thinking about something. She hummed in understanding, "you're right. I need to live my life. I can't keep waiting for him to come back, I need to let myself be happy and heal."

"That's the attitude I was looking for!" I cheered, laughing a bit.

She released a soft chuckle. "When are you free?"

"The weekends. During the weeks I have classes all day and sometimes there are rehearsals on the weekends, but not too often. We're doing Giselle this semester, but we haven't been assigned roles yet. Once that happens I'll be a lot busier."

"Oh that's fun! What's it about?"

I smiled at her enthusiasm, "it's about a woman who falls in love with a noble man and dies of a broken heart because they can't be together. She eventually saves his life and is allowed to rest in peace, though."

"I'll have to come watch you this year now that I'm all healed up."

"I'd love it if you could."

It was nice to have a connection to Forks. Bella's warmth reminded me of the Cullens' kindness and constant support of me. I'm sure if they were able to they'd come see me dance as well.

"You did Swan Lake last year, right?"

"Mhmm, do you know the story about that one?"

"Vaguely. Doesn't she turn into a swan or something like that?"

"Yup," I smiled before going more in depth, "she was cursed to turn into a swan during the day and only at night she is human which is when she meets her prince."

"Yes! I knew it was something like that." Bella grinned in self praise for a moment. "Well, anyway, I was wondering when you would be able to come visit."

"I can probably come next weekend if you'd like. Just tell me what time and I'll be there."

"Really?! Great, uh, can you do around noon?"

"Sounds good with me. That gives you time to go confront Jacob." I smirked, winking at her jokingly.

Bella's face flushed at my words causing me to snicker at her expression.

"I'm only messing with you, but the offer still stands if you need me to knock some sense into him." I said.

"Well, thank you. I'll let you know if I need to take you up on that." She grinned.

I was happy that she was finally smiling and in a better mood. I could tell that she was getting more comfortable with me.

The rest of the evening we spent talking about whatever came to mind until she announced that she had to leave. She had to drive back to Forks before her father, Charlie, would start to worry.

We exchanged numbers so that we would have an easier time contacting each other and so that she wouldn't have to take anymore spontaneous trips to Seattle.

My restless mind about how Bella was doing was finally put to bed. The only thing I could hope now was that Edward wouldn't murder me when he found out.