Helluva Boss: Loona one-shots

Loona x M! Assassin reader

Requested by: Jazz2064

As a loyal member of the Assassin's creed, you stood alongside outlaws who favored peace through free will. Forever and til death, your covenant fought against the Templars, who believed peace through order and control was the way to handle society, instead.

One time, during combat against a member of the Templars, his sword struck through your chest, paralyzing you and making you drop to the ground, where you died.

The next time you opened your eyes, you ended up in hell: a place housing sinners and accused wrongdoers judged by the angels in heaven.

You woke up laying on the sidewalk in the same position you died from. An imp waved a hand over your face.

"Uh, are you okay, there?" He said.

"Huh? Who are you?" You proceed to get up from the ground.

"Woah, easy there, big horse!"

You firmly placed your hand on your head. "Oh fuck, my head."

The imp puts your hands on your back as support. "Here, let's get you inside. You must be famished, or hungry, or whatever."

In front of them was a rather large building; the building that holds IMP Headquarters.

Finally, you stopped at the imp's office where you sat down in a folding chair. "So, who are you, exactly? And where am I?"

"Well, I'm glad you asked... I'm Blitzo and the 'o' is silent! I run a business with my wonderful co-workers called the Immediate Murder Professionals, or IMP for short... I'm sure you have heard our little jingle by now, right?"

"I'm afraid im not familiar with it."

Blitzo pulls out a TV. "Oh, you just GOT to see it." He plays it. After the music ended, you ask, "So I'm assuming this is your establishment?"

"Bingo!! That was my horse's name at some point. Fun fact."

"Interesting. From my understanding, you people take revenge on the living by assassinating them? If that's the case, I think I would be perfect for what you are trying to achieve, here." You hand him a folder detailing your experiences as a professional assassin.

"Yep! And it is all thanks to this big book here!" He pulls out Stola's teleportation book. "And by the looks of this portfolio, you would fit right in! Welcome aboard."

Blitzo shakes your hand with his claws guarding your wrist. "What's your name, by the way?" he asked.

"Y/N."

"That's weird... My horse was ALSO named that, too."

"Ladies and gentlemen, our newest employee: Y/N!"

Loona carelessly rolled her eyes and went back to being busy on her phone.

"Uh, nice to meet you, fellow employee. I'm Moxxie." He looked up at you shaking your hand. "Over there, is my beautiful wife, Milly."

"Hi there!" She hollered.

"Loonie, aren't you going to introduce yourself?" Blitzo says.

She gave an annoyed groan. "The name's Loona. There, happy?"

A goofy smiled appeared with his front teeth and nodded, making her frown even more.

As the atmosphere returned to a somewhat average level, Loona then lit up a cigarette in the receptionist's office as you were laying on the couch playing with a sharp knife; you rotated it with your finger at the tip.