GODSPEED || V.H

031

He carried a straight face while talking with some random classmate. I couldn't help but stare, I was starting to forget how he looked and I wasn't comfortable with that idea of fully forgetting about him yet.

It amazed me how I was able to erase him from my mind, but able to keep the memories and just block out his face only. I forgot that he had small beauty marks on his face, there wasn't a lot but I do remember playing the game with him how I would just lay kisses ontop of them.

He did a side glance, making our eyes land onto each other. I turned my head away immediately. It was obvious that I was staring at him I couldn't hide it and I was just mad that I still craved for him. I still wanted to call him up and ask him what the whole thing was about but it seemed like he meant those words and he looks so unbothered. I still wanted to call him and check if he was okay. I just wanted to hear his voice.

I pushed my way through the small crowd, leaving the school building onto the parking lot. I shuffle through my backpack finding my car keys "party?" Julian asked while approaching the car slowly.

"No" I glared up at him "I heard you and mr handsome broke up" he fake pouted "why is that? Did he cheat? Was it a game to the both of you?" He started to question out loud.

"Either way it's none of your business" I groan while unlocking my car. "I told you relationship don't last long" he quoted again, I opened my door finding it to shut again but by Julian. A spark of anger rose inside me, my eyes shot up to his.

He continued to wear that stupid smile of his "I'm going to count to three and you better remove your hands off my car before I snap your fingers off.." I threatened. His hands immediately jump off my car door "what's wrong with you?" "Each time we speak, I find you so much more annoying. Just kindly leave me the fuck alone" I said in serious tone while getting into my car.

I laid in my bed hold my hands up to my ears trying my best to block out any noise. It wasn't working but it was the thought that counts, it won't be long until I leave this place, everything will be quiet and alone. Just how I wanted it to be.

The arguing continued to get louder and I was getting more and more frustrated. I remember being able to block it all out, but today didn't seem like that. Finally I heard something shattered on the floor, I quickly sat up and continued to stare up at the door.

Debating to go downstairs and check it out, and then again I heard the loud clash. And I stayed put,I'm too scared to get in between the argument just remembering the time I got between it awhile back made me get anxious all over again.

TW: STRONG LANGUAGE.

I peeked out the doorway to find my mom sitting on the floor, picking the glass pieces my dad stood over her watching her small moves. His eyes ran up to mine narrowing after "well what the fuck are you doing? Help her!" he yelled. I didn't say anything but ran down by her side helping her place the small pieces into the plastic bag.

She winced at the cut that formed on her hand, it wasn't deep but it was a bit long and blood was now coming out of it. I placed my hand on her wrist pushing her hand away gently "it's okay I'll clean it up" i whispered giving her a small smile.

Tears were already streaming down her face and the bag under of her eyes seemed to be getting darker. She looked so worn out and sad, I wanted to help her.

"No" my dad gently kicked my back "let her help you, I mean she's good at cleaning anyways.. that's all woman are good for" he said while walking back into the kitchen.

I sighed while quickly grabbing her napkin, handing to her while biting the inside of my cheek. I continued to repeat to my mom about leaving the mess with me and to go ahead and clean her hand up but she kept declining.

After what felt like forever, we finished cleaning it back up and I went back to my room. Squeezing my pillow tight while my eyes continued to rest, I wanted to go home.

What did I do for him to end things? Remembering his comforting words made me want to cry even more. I wanted to be wrapped up in his arm one more time, this time so I could hold and squeeze him extra longer. What suck even more was I've already planned our future together, it wasn't nothing too big but just getting our own apartment somewhere in Seattle and just waking up to shirtless Vinnie by my side or him making us some breakfast.

I look so stupid right now, why was I acting this way. But I have to understand he was my first love. I can say that, everything felt real and nice to me. To me it was a relationship.

Chris's name flashed on my phone , it was an incoming call and I let it rung for a bit before answering.

"Hello?" "Ivy!" He shouted on the other side of the line. "Are you cutting me out again?! I was worried sick for you, vinnie and you weren't answering my messages and I thought you died" he groan.

"No still alive" I sighed "you could've atleast messaged me that" he chuckled. I stayed quiet on the line "you okay?" He brought the question up. I could feel a lump on my throat and my eyes immediately water.

"Yeah" I lied "just tired"I whispered. "Do you wanna hang out?" "Finishing things up in school, sorry" "no don't be, I think it's cool how your grades always stay up but don't overwork yourself okay?" Chris said "of course" I replied "text me when you're free, I wanna hang out. I need tips on how to win that girls heart.. you're my wing woman" he joked "I will" I laughed "we'll talk later, bye" I said waiting for him to said goodbye before hanging up.

My phone vibrated and I quickly went down to reach for it, to see another message from Chris.

She called me cute.. what do I say? I don't wanna be too cocky.. after that do I ask about her day?

The phone vibrated again.

Stop leaving me on read, help.

I let out a large huff before throwing myself back on my bed. I would message Vinnie, I do want to find a way where I could atleast spend 5 minutes with him. I don't care if it's a minute or three, I just wanted to spend one last time with him. And I wanted it to end on a good note, I don't want our last memory to be us arguing. He was my home and I miss him, his scent, his voice, and of course his smile and words.

I stared down at my phone to see Chris telling me to go to one the parties he was invited to this week. Who even has time to even party? Again he sent another message saying he was forcing me out the house, and he isn't scared to threaten me.