ᴅᴏᴘᴀᴍɪɴᴇ| Fezco X OC| Hellboyyy_

009-Karma.

Duende:
(n.) A heightened sense of emotion, passion, inspiration.

The bright fluorescent lights of the hospital became familiar while I was in recovery. My stomach turned every time a nurse would come in with more meds than the last, and I threw up hours later after taking them; All the drugs I had taken being flushed out of my system.

It hurt having to be here, but what hurt worse was having Avy watch me go down the same path I did before. I knew it was hurting her; what I did was tearing her apart. And I knew Mouse would never let this go. I knew they would both be keeping a close eye on me, making sure I don't touch another drug again in my life.

"You have to promise you'll never do it again, Domo. You and Tio are all I have left and I can't lose you,"

I couldn't hurt Avy even more, but I couldn't make that promise either. I was clean for months, but relapses happen so easily. That urge seems to overpower me every single time.

I hadn't seen Ashtray or Fezco since it happened, and I've been here for at least a week. I know I fucked up bad with the both of them, I knew how they felt about junky's. I had let both of them down. "I don't gotta go back to rehab, right?" One of the nurses was on duty and was giving me my meds, I took them after she handed them to me, gulping down water to swallow them.

"Probably, but some of the nurses are trying to vouch for you. They don't wanna see you in a body bag one day, Ms.Amana. You'll be out of here, But you need to stay away from all the things that are holding you back," While that may seem easy to them, I was around those drugs everyday of my life, I was a dealer after all.

"You'll probably be out of here in a couple of days, hopefully tomorrow. I'll be back in an hour to check on you, press the button if you need anything,"

"Can you give my... Friend a call? Ask him to come down here?" Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "You mean Fezco right? One of the other nurses did, he said he didn't want to see you..."

❃ǝuıɯɐdoᗡ❃

"Jacobs, can I crash at yours tonight?" For the first time in so long, I actually went to school today. Nothing changed much though, at least nothing that I knew of. "You have an apartment, why don't you just stay there?" As usual, Nate had to over complicate things. "I haven't stayed there for weeks and you know that. Stop being difficult, dude," He sighed, rolling his eyes at me. He stopped in the middle of the hallway, now standing in front of me. "Fine, You can ride back with me after practice,"

A large grin was plastered across my face at the boy, I knew he'd cave. He has a soft spot for me. "Thanks, I'll see you last period,"

I didn't see him last period. In fact, I didn't get to his house until later in the day. I couldn't let him see me high, I wasn't in the mood to have a Nate Jacobs intervention. Last time I had one was the first time Nate had ever cried in front of me, I couldn't watch him break down like that again.

So, when I did arrive, I saw his truck in the drive way. His parents had given me a key so I was free to walk in whenever. His parent's had soft spots for me too, they'd practically give me whatever I wanted and treat me like their own. They aren't close to Avy but they talk to her sometimes whenever they see her with me.

All the lights were off meaning everyone was in their rooms, and when I made my way upstairs, Nates parents lights were off and his dads office door was closed. Nate's room light was on though, telling me he was still awake. Giving a soft and short knock, he opened it for me before rolling his eyes and going back to his bed.

"Wow, I not even a "Welcome home Dutch, how was your day!?" What the fuck is up your ass tonight?" He sent me a death glare, meaning I needed to shut the fuck up right now. "Where the fuck were you? You were supposed to ride back with me after practice and I couldn't find you. And why didn't you answer your phone when I called?"

Shit. I'm fucked. Despite the fact that Jacobs and I were growing apart, we still had a lot of love for each other; A bond that couldn't be broken, not even if we wanted to break it. So the fact I had missed so many calls and texts from him, which I'm currently staring at, means I royally fucked up.

"Sorry, my ringer was off. I haven't really been on my phone these days," He scoffed before turning back to his own. "You're a drug dealer, your excuse makes zero sense,"

I had to leave the situation alone, otherwise, things would turn dark real fast. Between Nates anger issues and my impulse control issues, we were bound to end up in a heated argument. So instead, I grabbed some clothes and got dressed. When I was done, I sat down on the bed. Nate hadn't said a word to me since, he could be so childish sometimes.

"You gonna keep being a dick or are you gonna move over so I can get on the bed?" With a huff, he moved over and I sat down, propping myself up on the headboard. "You can be a real prick, you know that?" He rolled his eyes before wrapping his arms around me and bringing me closer.

"I'm sorry, I'm just stressed. Especially after your OD, I'm worried about you, Amana. You're killing yourself," Nate could be an asshole, but he was also a softy deep down inside. Between his daddy issues and his Maddy issues, he was constantly going through a lot. "It's okay, I'm okay,"

"I fucking hate this town..." His voice was soft and tired as he started drifting to sleep. "Yo Tambien..."

❃ǝuıɯɐdoᗡ❃