I Wish I Didn't Exist (Gold x Silver - Pokémon boy x boy ship)

Chapter Eighteen: You Need To Get Out Of There!

"Wow! That's so cute! And definitely something he would do!" Susanna says reacting to Silver's story.

"Yeah! I'm quite touched and a bit embarrassed too"

"Why embarrassed?"

"Just at how brave he was. I can't even stick up for myself. I feel quite insignificant."

"Silver, you need to get out of there. She's crushing your soul. I honestly don't think you can continue like this. It's not good for you. Your mental health can't keep taking the hits." Susanna says concerned.

"That's all well and good saying that. And yes! It's true! But... Where the hell am I supposed to go? I don't have the money to move out!"

Susanna chuckles: "Silver. You do have somewhere to go!"

"What you talking about?"

"Seriously!? I think that gorgeous bit of stuff of yours will take you home the split second he catches wind of this!"

"No!" Silver exclaims.

"Why not?" Susanna reacts.

"Because... It's too soon. We've only been together for a month. I don't want to encroach on his space and completely disrupt his life. Besides, mum would be furious."

"OK! 1 - You talk constantly and you're together alot, I think you're safe with that one. 2 - He's been in love with you for years, I bet you all the money in the world that he's already thought, in fact, I'll rephrase that, fantasised about you two living together. And 3 - Who cares!? The whole point is to get you out of there!" Susanna explains.

"Yeah but that's not the right reason to move in together. It should be because we're in that place in our relationship, not because I need to get away from my mother." Silver responds.

"I don't think that should matter." Susanna snarks.

Silver rolls his eyes.

*****************
"Guess who!?" Gold says covering Silver's eyes from behind.

"Uhm... Lance?" Silver jokes.

"Oaft! What an insult!" Gold chuckles taking his hands away.

Silver laughs as he turns to look at him. Gold pecks him on the cheek.
Silver takes Gold's hands: "Gold I... I just want to thank you for coming over to my house and fighting for me. It was really sweet and amazing of you."

"You've said this already. I'll always fight for you. I just hope I didn't make things worse for you."

"Well..." Silver says looking away.

"Silver... I know it's not my place and I'm probably way out of line for what I'm about to say but... I really think you need to get out of that house. I think it's having a bad effect on you." Gold says looking down.

"See!? I told you!" Susanna interjects.

Silver looks and gives her the evil eyes which made her promptly turn round to look away.

"Silver!" Gold says getting his attention again: "I think... Uhm..." Gold still looking down, tapping his index fingers together: "Move in with me!"

"What!?" Silver says in surprise.

Gold looks him in the eye: "Move in with me! I know we've only been together a month but you know that I love you and you know that I'll take care of you. Of course I know you're not ready to say I love you back and that's still OK, but, I know I can make you happy."

Silver is stunned. Part of him shouldn't be surprised. It's quite typical of Gold to be selfless and offer something like that but still, he doesn't want to be a burden.

~Don't burden him. He's only offering because he feels sorry for you. You're just a waste of space. You're beyond help!~

"Gold! I really appreciate the selfless offer but, I can't."

Gold takes a deep breath. He looks almost hurt: "W-Why not?" He stutters.

"I don't want to encroach on your space and completely disrupt your life. I'd feel bad! I'll just be a burden, you don't need to offer just because you're worried." Silver confesses.

Gold shakes his head. As though in disbelief: "Silver. You know fine well that that's not true. That voice in your head is trying to trick you! You know I'm being sincere with my offer. But, I'm not going to force you. Just, at least, think about it, OK?"

"OK! I promise!" Silver responds.

Gold gives a bright smile. He kisses Silver on the cheek again and takes his leave. He has errands to run.
***********************

"What you going to do?" Susanna enquires after a few moments of silence.

"I don't know. That niggling part of my brain is telling me not to do it. Telling me it's too soon, that my mum will be furious. But...  My heart is telling me that it'll be great. He loves me so much and I think I probably will be better off living with him... "

"What's the issue?" Susanna quizzes.

"Gold is so understanding that I'm not ready to say 'I love you' but I don't want to take advantage and wear out his patience."

"Silver..." Susanna begins: "Do you think your feelings for Gold will become feelings of love? Do you think you can say 'I love you'?"

There's silence. He eventually looks at Susanna with his tear soaked eyes:

"I want to. I really do.
But... I don't think I know how to love...."