Loki's darling

chapter 32

After you have made sure that they were gone, you headed to downstairs. You opened the door and Bucky was almost in the same position as last time you saw him. "Y/N?" he said surprised by your appearance. You got up from your wheelchair and took slowly but confidently few steps towards him.

Your wound had healed good, but it still needed some time, and your walking was already better too.

"I thought you wouldn't want to see me ever again." Bucky sighed. You didn't answer on that but just glared.
"Y/N, please... I'm so sor..." Bucky started but got interrupted by you. "Shut up, I'm not here to listen your self-pitying." you grumbled at him. You normally weren't that mean to people but he killed your mother, you felt like you had to.
Bucky sighed heavily and looked at straight into your eyes.
"Do you remember it? When you murdered her?" you asked when you had finally walked in front of him, outside of the glass of course.

"I... I do remember. Not the whole thing though, only some parts." he mumbled quietly. "You know, I still remember how she was killed. I saw the whole thing, but I never could knew it was you who I saw that day." you grumbled a bit and tried to hold back your tears. Bucky didn't answer, he clearly regretted it.
"But why didn't you kill me back then? You said that Hydra wanted both of us dead." you added and looked at him little confused. "I don't know, I have been thinking the same a long time now. I remember how I saw you behind that door and I looked at you a long time. But something or someone inside me told me to not kill you. That is one of the things I also remember." he explained.

You shook your head, you didn't believe him. You didn't want to.
"That's impossible. If you're brainwashed, I assume that you can't just control yourself. You're lying." you murmured and glared at him.
"I'm not! Trust me Y/N I..."

"Trust you..? No, never." you growled interrupting him again. Bucky was speechless, he didn't know how he could make you believe him.
"Y/N... all I wanted was just to be father to you. That's why I tracked you after I got myself out of Hydras hands. Since then I have been watching over you from distance." he told you calmly and sighed.
"What? You have been spying on me?!" you asked little furiously. Your anger started to grow again.

"No, not spying....
My first idea was to find you and took you living with me again, but when I finally found you, I noticed that you already had a family. I knew they would take good care of you, better than I ever could. Besides I had been so long time gone that I thought you would do better without me. And although I wasn't here with you, I never stopped loving you. You're my daughter." Bucky told you gently and smiled carefully while a tear fell down on his cheek.

"I'm not your daughter!" you yelled suddenly, making Bucky flinch and look at you little shocked. Then he leaned his head down and looked at the floor hurted. "I know it's hard to forgive me, but It wasn't me who killed your mother, my love, it was Hydra's brainwashed guy." he tried to defend himself a bit from you anger.
You shook your head while your eyes started to tear up again. "No... it was you, and I will never forgive you. You're never gonna be my father." you murmured and turned your back on him. You walked slowly back to your wheelchair.
"You just can't ignore me for the rest of your life, we're family by blood!" Bucky shouted after you.
You went to the elevator and gave him a final look. "Watch me." were your last words before the doors closed.

You sighed heavily and let the tears fall down. It was done, now you finally knew everything. You didn't have to see him ever again.

*

"You did what?!" Loki raised his voice at you. You had just told him accidentally about your meeting with Bucky. Loki looked angry, but also worried.
You looked down on your feet and didn't respond. Loki sighed and took few steps closer to you and kneeled.
"Are you alright darling? Didn't meant to yell at you, I'm sorry." he told you softly and placed his hand on your cheek. You smiled at his soft side.
"It's alright, I'm okay." you replied gently and grabbed his hand which was still on your cheek. "Why did you do it?" Loki asked then and made concerned look on you. "I needed to know... that's all. Besides I have already decided that I don't wanna meet him ever again." you told him while tear fell down your cheek. Loki wiped it off. "I understand my love." he said gently and kissed you.

After that you spent rest of the evening with him in his room. He had taken you there after he had came from the mission. You asked him about the mission too, but he didn't tell you what it was about. It pissed you a little, because you felt outsider at the time. But Loki told you to not worry about it and you knew that he wasn't going to tell you anyway, so you gave up.

***

Few days passed and you have learned to walk again finally. It was still little stumbling but you just had to walk it off. You're wounds had also healed completely, good to be more than just a human.

"Carefully darling." Loki told you as you almost fell while you were heading to the kitchen. He caught you and lifted you back up. "These stupid legs still don't work as they should." you whined.
"They will, you just have to give them little more time, my love." Loki told you with a little smirk on his face. You smirked back, you liked how he used those pet names, it was adorable.

Elevator's doors opened and you walked in your arm locked in Loki's. Peter were there, eating pancakes. "Oh hi mr Loki, and Y/N." he greeted you instantly. You both nodded and Loki guided you to sit across Peter. You still didn't like him much, because he had taken your place in the team. Gladly, you were almost on your feet again and you could soon get your place back on the team.

"You want some?" Peter asked after a awkward silence between you too while Loki headed to the fridge. "No thanks.." you mumbled and looked away.
"Uhm.. you know, I'm really sorry about this." Peter told you and tried to reach your eyes. "I mean... I didn't mean to step on your toes. But Tony asked me for this and I really wanted to so.." he added before you stopped him by raising your hand. "It's alright, this isn't your fault. And I'm sorry I was so rude back then, that's not how I normally act." you apologized and turned your eyes on him. He looked at you relieved as his eyes sparkled. "Well, I guess we're okay then." he said gladly and smiled. You nodded and then looked at Loki, who watched you two from aside. There was little bit of.... jealous? in his eyes.