Ugly Little Liar (I only want you sequel) Killua x reader

A/n

Hey guys! I know you said it's fine and all buttttt I'm still saying sorry, which is probably getting annoying-

But I think I might take a short break to try and figure some stuff out.

I don't know how long, or I might just post shorter chapters.

I'm not sure, we'll see how I feel.

Vent warning, molestation, murder, gore, dark thoughts, ahead ⚠️

I just kinda have not been feeling good, maybe cause I'm gonna get my period. But I also feel shitty mental wise.

I will tell you but you might not like me after.. so tw for murder and gore.

I'm not necessarily safe..

I mean, I've never really hurt anyone besides when I was younger like a black eye or a bloody lip and choking- you know what this does seem violent-

But lately as I was maybe 11 I started getting darker thoughts.

They were little at first like taking this annoying kid I hated and shooting her- okay nevermind that's not little.

But I also thought of killing my step dad the one who molested me.

I kept it to myself.

But then around older 12 it got bad. I started having this person to talk to me. They were mean. They called me things like worthless piece of shit. And they told me it was all my fault everything happened. And It was my fault i almost killed my family.

They yelled at me at night. I cried cause I'm sensitive. Then someone else came along. They said things like. Why'd it happen to me. What did I do to deserve it. It's my fault.

They would come at different times.

I was fucking miserable. I did start cutting around 11 even though it wasn't necessarily cutting. I couldn't make blood come out so it just left marks. But one day I did make blood come out and was so happy I could hurt myself more.

So I would cut and have the mean girl yell at me. I would also laugh- because I was so happy I was making myself feel pain cause I  deserved it or maybe cause I was just fucking crazy.

But then I started thinking about killing people. Like my mom and brother.

And it started getting Gorey. I would think about stabbing them and then taking their guts out and stuffing them in their mouth.

Cutting off limbs and rearranging them. Tearing out eyeballs. Etc.

Then she came along.

She started the thoughts. She told me to kill my mom. She said my mom deserved it for making me suffer.

And one time. My mom yelled at us for not cleaning even though we just woke up. And I got angry cause I have anger issues.

I was in the kitchen and she came. The girl started telling me to go stab her in the chest with the scissors. She kept telling me and telling me and had me imagine it.

I had to stop either her or me from laughing. I don't know which. And I was holding the scissors so tight so I wouldn't go and stab her.

I had to physically stop myself from killing her. It was so irritating that I couldn't go and stab her repeatedly.

But I had common sense. And I took something of mine to my room and I let out my laugh while I imagined me killing her.

There were more times like that. Same with my brother. And one time my mamaw. I even broke down to my mom that I wasn't safe and that I could literally kill her.