Scars (Ziam)

Letters

Another update?? Yes!

Hope this chapter doesn't feel too rushed or anything. Most of it is the letters from his family and from Zayn.

The next chapter gets interesting!

Warning: Mentions of depression and anxiety, guilt, the car accident, and LOTS of emotion.

Love you all, and I hope this is a good enough chapter. ❤

Chapter 30:

    When the small knock on my door sounded, I had already been awake. I was laying there in bed for hours on end. My eyes were burning from lack of sleep, all of the time spent just staring into space. I couldn't feel anything.

   The door pushed open, and Ruth walked in with a small blue and white bag and a mug in the other. She offered me a sheepish smile as she sauntered in, standing beside my bed and setting down the mug on the nightstand. I saw her glance briefly at the unopened letters on my nightstand.

   "I picked up the pills Dr. Rowe prescribed," She informed, making my heart sink all over again. "You need to take them, Li. Both these and the anxiety medication, and I am not leaving until you do."

   "What if they don't work?" I mumbled out, barely having the strength to voice my concerns.

   "Then we try again. A different dosage, a different medication, whatever needs to be done," She vowed, pulling out the medication from her pocket and grabbing my discarded anxiety meds from my nightstand. The bottle was clearly untampered with; unopened, but she didn't say a word about my lie.

   She unscrewed both and took out one pill each. Setting the bottles down, she turned to me and held her hand out. The two pills sat there, intimidating me with their very existence.

   "I made you some tea and fetched you a bagel. You can do this."

   I had to muster what little strength I had to sit up in bed. I felt exhausted afterwards, but I took the pills from her hand and stared at them in my own.

   They couldn't have been more than a few centimeters wide. They were the same size as my pinky fingernail, but they seemed so much bigger. They were pale in colour, and I shut my eyes as I tossed them into my mouth, taking the cup of tea from Ruth's hand and forcing myself to swallow the pills down passed the lump in my throat.

   I was nearly panting as I finished, setting the cup down on my nightstand and ignoring the outstretched bagel bag that Ruth was offering me. I wasn't hungry.

  "Liam, you have to eat," She stated. It was no longer her begging. She was trying to take control of the situation, but I couldn't imagine myself taking a single bite of the breaded treat.

  "I will. Just... set it on the nightstand," I reasoned, and I was surprised as she did exactly as I asked.

  "I'll be back to check on you, and it you haven't eaten, then I will sit beside you until you do. Do I make myself clear?"

  I gave a numbing nod before she turned to leave the room. She was halfway out of the door when she suddenly stopped with a loud "Oh!" escaping her lips. She turned to me and dug into her back pocket, pulling out a folded up letter and handing it out to me. "This is from Zayn. He dropped it off this morning, but I told him you were sleeping."

   I stared at the paper in her hand, knowing full-well what it was. He was the first person I told about the assignment, but he was also the one who took the most time to write out his thoughts about me. It made my heart ache and my stomach become rather unsettled. Eating was definitely out of the question as I hesitantly accepted the note from her hand.