Frerard - Guys Like Us

Goodbye

Gerard lay on his bed with his eyes staring at a stain on the ceiling. He hadn't blinked in some time and only did so when a stray tear rolled down the side of his face, sliding down his neck and landing on the pillow. Now he had blinked, more tears fell from his sad eyes, and he couldn't stop them. Nor did he want to. He needed every drop to leave before Frank came by his cell.

He didn't want to cry in front of Frank today. He didn't want their last day together to be filled with sadness and sorrow. Even though he knew he would feel that way, he didn't want to project that onto Frank.

So he allowed himself to pour his sorrow out now; let his tears spill freely down his cheeks. He felt exhausted half an hour later when his eyes had finally run dry.

He got up and splashed water on his face. He didn't go to get breakfast that morning, instead staying in his cell to finish a drawing he had been working on for Frank. He also didn't want to risk getting upset in front of anyone - he was Gerard Way and he couldn't show any vulnerability whatsoever. The vultures would smell his weakness a mile off.

Adding the final touches to his artwork he heard a tiny tap against his wall. Looking up he saw his beautiful fiancé with a sad smile on his face.

"Why weren't you at breakfast?" he asked walking into Gerard's cell and sitting by him.

"Wasn't hungry" Gerard smiled back, opening his arms up to Frank.

Frank happily snuggled into him, feeling Gerard place a soft kiss on the top of his head.

"Are you ok?" Frank asked.

"Yeah" Gerard lied. "Bet you can't wait to get out of here huh?"

Frank simply looked up to his soulmate and felt tears threaten his eyes.

"I don't want to go Gee" Frank stated; his lip trembling. "I don't want to fucking leave you."

He pulled Gerard tighter to him and began to weep into his chest. It took everything in his power not to cry too, but Gerard was determined. He wanted to put a positive front on for Frank. This was supposed to be a good day for him, not a fucking shitty one.

"Hey! You listen to me!" he held Frank out at arms length. "You're gonna be fine. You're gonna go out there and start building a great fuckin' life for yourself."

"A life for us" Frank corrected instantly.

"Yeah" Gerard sighed quietly. "A life for us."

Gerard's biggest fear about Frank leaving was that he would move on without him. That he would be snapped up by someone worthy of him and forget about Gerard, realising that he was nothing special. He was afraid that once outside, Frank would come to his senses and see that Gerard would only hold him back. He wished he was a better person and actually want that for his boyfriend, because he really did deserve better, and he should have someone who could give him a better life. But he was selfish, and he wanted Frank for himself. He wanted them to be together even if it wasn't the future Frank deserved. He imagined a perfect life with the man he'd asked to marry him, picturing them living in a normal world, with a job and a dog and each other. But he wasn't stupid - he knew he was unlikely to be given much of a chance because of his violent criminal record. At least Frank had a job ready and waiting for him. Ray had got him fixed up at the record store where he worked, which would suit Frank perfectly.

"I mean it Gee" Frank pulled him from his thoughts. "I'll work every hour I can to get us a place to call home. I'll have it nice for you."

God. He was so cute and adorable and thoughtful, and any other word that meant basically 'perfect', and Gerard couldn't help but lean towards him and slowly kiss him.