two | h.s. - t.c.

53

Jenny's pov

i awoke before him, gently playing with his hair a bit longer before i decided to get up. it was still dark out, and my body felt like i had slept for only an hour or two. i guess i shouldn't stay until the morning anyways, all the boys would make my life a living hell if they saw me. plus i needed to take a shower and get ready for bed. i also don't think we were meant to sleep, we just so happened to. these all sound like excuses—but they were all true. i'm thinking too much, i'll stop now.

my eyes were still stinging—like i had just cried—though i knew i hadn't. it was easy to slip away from him, his head now resting on his pillow. i slipped my dress on, the room pitch black besides the moonlight that peaked through his half open curtains.

"where're you going?" i heard him mumble, his voice a rasp.

"i didn't mean to wake you—go back to sleep." i whispered, near the end of his bed as i saw him lazily sit up.

"no." he simply said. "come here."

i didn't know what to say, didn't know why i was making up excuses to myself. but if i said i feel like i'm going to cry, that'd be a little too out of the blue. but by the time he had rubbed his eyes and fully opened them, i was already standing by the door. i told him to stay yet i was the one leaving—i guess we were more alike than i thought.

"jenny come back here." he said more clearly, jerking his chin toward the spot next to him.

i paused before i walked back towards the bed, and he lifted the blanket as he pulled my arm. i gave in and let him pull me back under the covers, where he held me tightly in his arms, his eyes looking at me for an explanation.

"don't walk away like that." he said. he shook his head slightly before before shaking it more noticeably. "don't," he furrowed his brows a bit, "don't. not when," he swallowed, "not when i'm asleep and don't know what's going on. don't make me wake up alone and have me wonder why you left. have me wonder what it was that i did wrong."

he wasn't talking about me.
he was talking about his parents. and he was still in a haze.

"don't." he said again as he shook his head.

"i won't." i gently stroked his hair, "i won't, i'm sorry. i'm right here."

he tightened his grip before cuddling his face into my chest again, tangling our legs together. i knew he wasn't sleeping, even when it felt like another hour had passed as we laid here in silence. all i could think about were his parents. his parents leaving him, an eleven year old. abandoning him one day, when he thought things were fine. when he went to sleep that night, probably just thinking about waking up for school the next day. seeing his friends. his life changed forever that day.

i kissed the top of his head, and though i meant to do it only once, i did it every time i pictured him alone. which was probably about five times within the minute that had gone by. he tilted his head up, finally showing me his face. his eyes glossy. i didn't think he'd cry, though the tears were there in his eyes. and i knew he was probably thinking about the same thing.

he kissed me, again and again, not stopping until when we both had pulled away, our emotions were composed. and he gave me a smile, one that said he was okay. i didn't think he was okay.

and then he kissed me again, and i knew he needed a distraction. i gave him one, allowing things to escalate as i laid beneath him, repeating what we had just done. he was slow and gentle this time, his lips kissing mine the whole time—i knew tomorrow he'd probably say he was kissing me to make sure i wasn't being loud. but i could argue against any of his annoying jokes he'd give me later because we didn't do it to get off or meet our needs. it felt so...emotional—it's the first time it's felt this way. i don't think it's ever felt this way.