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tw: topics of ab*rtion, if this makes you uncomfortable skip this chapter⚠️

"IM happy but with this environment that we are in and the fact we are all in the gang and do such dangerous things it's just not the right environment for a baby i don't want to say it but i think you should get an abortion" he says.

you would think your boyfriend telling you, you should get an abortion would be bad but i was relieved to hear this.

"i completely agree i don't want to raise a child in this environment and we're not even in our twenty's we're both still teenagers and now we know we can have kids in the future together" i say.
"so your gonna get an abortion" he says.
"yea i'll call and make the appointment" i say.
"okay just know i love you no matter what and i can't wait to have kids with you in the future" he says smiling placing his hands on my waist.
"me too" i say smiling and giving him a peck.
"i'm gonna call a planned parenthood" i add on.
"okay baby but should we tell the others or keep it to ourselves" he asks.
"just us know who knows how they would react about this" i say.
"okay" he says agreeing.

i go into our bathroom and call a planned parenthood making and confirming my appointment for next tuesday at 2:30 pm. i go back into our room and tell josh when my appointment is he nods. i leave our room and go to cynthia and quinton's room, i knock a few times and hear a come in. i open the door and see cynthia there on the bed just on her phone, i walk in and shut the door and lay on the bed next to her.

"i told josh i'm pregnant" i say.
"you're pregnant?!" i hear quinton say as he storms out of the bathroom.
"umm yea suprise but quinton you can't tell anyone because josh and i decided to get an abortion" i say.
"wow okay i won't tell anyone about it but just know me and cynth support you completely" he says and cynthia nods in agreement.
"thank you we just don't want a baby growing up in this environment and with the gang you never know what can happen" i say.
"yea i get that" he says.
"well i have an appointment for it next tuesday afternoon" i say.
"okay if you need any help or anything i'm here okay" cynthia says.
"okay thank you" i say.
"love y'all" i add on.
"love you too" both of them say.

a week later

today was the day. i was beyond nervous but both josh and i know this is for the best. we both aren't ready for kids right now and both of us are in a mafia and so is everyone we live with we can't raise a child in that type of environment.

both josh and i walk into the planned parenthood holding hands standing in the small line to check in.

"you can sit down okay" i tell josh as i see we're up next.
"okay i love you" he says kissing my head.
"i love you too" i say giving him a small smile.

i walk towards the counter.

"name?" a lady asks.
"nessa barrett" i say.
"okay fill out this paperwork" she says handing me a clipboard with paper clipped in with along with a pen.
"then a nurse will come and get you and then the doctor will perform the operation" she adds on.
"o-okay thank you" i say.
"don't be nervous honey your in good hands" she says giving me a warm smile that i try to return.

i walk to where josh is sitting and begin filling out the paperwork answering basic questions. after a few pages and a few signatures i walk back up to the counter and hand the same lady the clipboard and pen, then walking back to josh. i hood his hand giving it a tight squeeze. we sit there for what felt like an eternity but in reality only a few minutes when i hear my name called. i give josh a reassuring smile and a small peck and i walk following behind the nurse.

she shows me into a room and begins taking basic things like my blood pressure, heartbeat, tempature, etc.

"the doctor will be right in" she says smiling.

i nod in response. she closes the door and a few seconds later another woman enters.

"hello nessa, i'm doctor kay i'm going to be performing your operation, you will just feel some pressure and for after there will be about 2-3 days of light spotting similar to a menstrual cycle and just use pads for it and you will have cramping similar to menstrual cramps do you have any questions before we begin"
"no"
"okay than we shall begin"

about 30 minutes later

i walk out of the room going to where josh is sitting.

"ready to go" he asks.
"yea" i reply.

we walk to the car getting in and him beginning to drive home.

"how do you feel?" he asks.
"fine just feels like i'm on my period" i say.

he nods in response.

we arrive home after a bit of driving, and i walk to our room taking off my shoes and jumping into bed pulling the covers over my body and letting sleep take over.

a's typing...

heyyyyy

so this chapter is pretty dark

but anywaysss

how's y'all's day?

mines good so far

love you guys thank you for the support i am so thankful for all of you guys

-a

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