"The moon is beautiful isn't it?"
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Love cut people short, and with her past catching up to her and a new guy she's bound to fall in love with, can she keep up with herself, and her past?
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philocalist: lover of beauty.
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To understand the beauty of the world, you had to appreciate the small things. Like watching the rain drip down the windows as you drove by tons of trees, nature fulfilling your eyesight.
I learned that almost everything was art, whether we liked it or not. From heartbreak to splashes of paint. Everything was beautiful, even in its painful times.
I believed everything had a purpose, or it was made purely to put you through a lesson, but I learned, everything was art. Everything could be looked at as a way to be admired, or studied or just observed, because it was art.
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The awkward silence just sat, wandering through the air. I sat on his couch, wondering what to say. The painful reminiscing of what happened between us last.
I wanted to speak, or just cough to break the silence.
"So..." I said, prolonging my letters.
"How are you?" He asked, I pondered on that question, thinking about the fact he'd never asked that.
"I'm, okay." It was true, I was just, okay.
"That's it?"
"Can we just move on, I need to ask you something."
"Oh. Okay." It was awkward, painfully like I was back in high school pretending I could answer a question I didn't know the answer to.
"Do you wanna go to an art gallery? Or just anything."
I've realized, I've never been this awkward around him, I've never felt so caged in, confused.
"Sure! Totally." He was never this bad either, never this confused in our friendship.
"So, when?" I lightened up, slightly pulling a smile on my face.
"Later today? Just show up, I'll be free."
"Okay, got it!"
I hated how we changed, how we felt different, a kiss changes, everything.
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I wished to once again be normal with this guy, I knew things would change the moment he left that apartment, but I just wanted that guy back, the guy I could dance in the rain with, the guy I could pretend to be engaged to.
It was like the moment his lips touched mine I wouldn't even feel the same around him, never feel like we were just friends.
He kinda felt like my home. His sweet eyes looking at me as he wiped away my tears, or his hugs when I felt like I was at my end. This guy I had met almost 3 months ago, was part of my home.
