Closer To You

40.

Jason Saint

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bystander: a person who is present at an event or incident but does not take part.

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My mood suddenly changed, her words washing over me as I understood them. I didn't fully process everything that was going on, her head resting on my chest.

"Vee...?" I questioned, her tears stopping ever so slightly.

She didn't respond to my call for her, her sweet smile gone for what seemed like a lifetime. I wanted to help her, say anything that would change her emotions of pain.

I stared as she got up, walking into the bedroom and closing the door behind her. I watched as the door clicked, wishing I could put that smile back on her face.

I walked over, knocking on the door that separated us. This wood between us put us in two different places, emotionally, and physically. I wanted to hold her in my arms, tell her everything would be okay. I knew that reality couldn't have happened in this moment, but i wish it could've.

I heard a small sound, the door slightly opening as she looked up, trying to force a smile on her lips. My finger ran across her cheek, wiping the tears from her face. Her cheeks flushed with pink, a small grin on my face.

Her mouth slightly opened, wanting to speak as she opened the door a little more. I walked inside, sitting down next to her. My finger pushing a small strand of hair behind her ear.

She slightly whispers, holding back tears in her eyes.

"Hey." She chokes out, avoiding my eyes.

"Vee, please talk to me." I begged, my hand holding hers.

"I don't know what to say." She whispered again, trying to explain herself.

"Then don't say anything." I smiled at her, kissing her forehead.

"I just have to explain something, something about my mom." She got quieter as she spoke, trying to keep her voice from shaking. "Everything I said wasn't exactly true." She continued, looking away from me and breaking eye contact.

"What?" It wasn't a question of full confusion, just a moment of uncertainty, a moment of fear.

"My mom knew I was going to leave, just not when, and just not where." She spoke up, holding herself back from something. "She didn't know I was dating Corey but she saw the marks, she saw the scars. She just never asked or said anything."

My heart broke for her, how could a mother not try and help her. She was being abused, she had been hurt in so many ways, and her own mother stayed silent. How could one not care for their own flesh and blood?

"I'm so sorry." I brushed my finger against her cheek, wiping the small tear that rested there.

"Don't be, I know she meant well, she didn't want to pry and get into my own personal life. It may not have been the perfect choice but she was trying and she was trying her best. She was struggling just as much as I was. It's not her fault, she wasn't the one abusing me." She tried to smile, forcing one on her lips.

"But she didn't say anything. She watched as your life got worse, she watched as someone hurt you over and over again."

"Jason you don't have the full story, you can't judge her. She's a single mom with barely any ideas of how to even raise a kid. Her parents were never close with her how do you expect her to be close with me?"

"I didn't mean to overstep it's just, I can't imagine someone standing by and watching as their kid came home over and over again with bruises on them." I didn't want to intrude, or make her angry, I just couldn't exactly process it all at once.

"Neither could I, but I understood in the long run, she had much worse things going on in her life." She continued, bringing her voice down a little.

"But you're her kid, you should've been her top priority?" I wondered, what more could be going on that she let her child go through that.

"I wish that was the case, but she was someone else's child too. A child about to lose their mother." She sighed, finally looking back up at me.

The room went silent for a bit, the cold breeze filling the air as her hand crept in mine, my other hand slowly wrapping around her, pulling her closer to me, resting her head on my chest.

My hand rubbed her back, letting her know it would all be okay. I smiled as I kissed the top of her head, her hand firmly around mine. To know how much she's gone through hasn't hurt me physically, but knowing someone so sweet and so perfect had been caused so much pain hurt me mentally. If she couldn't even get the treatment she deserved, what was I destined for?

She's as pretty as a sunset, all she's ever done was truly make meg happy. Sure we've both made mistakes but she, she's never hurt me like anyone else ever has. She's made me better, she's made me someone I wish I could've been before. Vienna changed my life, made me smile even when I wanted to cry, she's the perfect girl, she's my dream girl.

I knew behind that door was something that would open up those wounds and nightmares she held down, causing her pain I couldn't stop. I also knew that behind that door was the person who made her feel loved, made me who she is today. I knew that opening that door would make her smile, but make her cry.

I knew that door was something that couldn't be changed, because at some point she'd have to face it, I like to think that I could be able to change the outcome of that pain, but she knows, and I know that no one can change fate, no one can change that destiny.

"You know I love you, right?" I whispered, wanting her to know that everything she did, every choice she made, I would love her for.

"Of course I do." She slightly laughed, the first time since that knock on the door. The first genuinely laugh since that one sound, since that single knock.

It's crazy how one thing can change a person so much, how one knock can make a person laugh or cry, make a person spew their heart out.

Peoples emotions change so hard, it's easy to feel closer to them.

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a/n: love you :), apologies for such a short chapter, life's a struggle rn. but tysm for 50k it's been a rollercoaster ever since I started this book for a little fun, it's so crazy to think about such a big number, so even if you've ever liked or read a small part of this book, thank you sm and i love you <3