Closer To You

41.

Jason Saint

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"Why don't you open the door?" I questioned, a couple minutes after the silence filled the room. I knew she was scared, and I knew this overwhelming fear of change was coming.

She didn't respond, her whole body going still. It was her mother outside that door, the woman she's known her whole life, but something about her had made her so scared, she couldn't even face her.

It could've been guilt, fear, anything that really would cause a change within their relationship.

"Why should I?" She responded, questioning my question. And to think she was the same one who's get mad when I did that. I smiled at the slight thought of our beginnings, taking the time to acknowledge how much we've grown and changed.

They told me I'd stop growing when I was younger, when my mind was fully formed. I haven't reached that point, and I'm not sure any human truly does.

"She's your mom. You know her and she knows you. She was there when you were born, when you took your first steps- she's the woman who may understand you most."

"I haven't seen her in years Jason. I don't know her anymore, she doesn't know me." She slightly moved away, taking her hand off mine.

"This is your chance, get to know her all over again." I wasn't close with my dad, knowing he was the only parent I had left was hard, and knowing that I'd lost that chance to be close with him hurt more than I could imagine, and I don't want Vienna to lose that chance too.

"I don't know if I want to." There was a small tremble in her voice as if she was unsure of herself.

"Why not?" I wondered, I just had to understand, maybe it was the loss of my mother that's making me push so hard, but I just couldn't understand, why not?

"What if she hates me?" Her cheeks flushed, tears welling in her eyes again.

"What if she just misses you?" I smiled, wanting to make her comfortable, make her happy. All I've ever wanted is for her to be happy, for her to not get hurt.

"I'm scared."

"And that's okay." I pressed a kiss to her cheeks, taking her hand as I slowly opened the door, leading her through the living room. I wanted her to open the door, not force something so big on her. This was her choice, and I was just here to support.

"Jason, what if she hates me? What if she came here to say she's disappointed, or that I'm the daughter she always wishes she never had?"

"Then I cant stop her, I cant change the way she thinks or what she thinks of you. I can just be here to help." I said, letting go of her hand as she placed it on the doorknob.

She twisted it slowly, the door clicking open as she backed away. A smaller lady standing in front of us. She looked to be 5'6 as she looked up as us. I put my hand out, looking for a handshake.

"I'm Jason, nice to mee-" I said, swiftly getting cut off.

"I know who you are." She seemed serious but friendly, her voice firm but kind.

"Vienna." She turned from me, looking at Vee. She stayed silent as she looked slightly down at her mother, a little scared as she rubbed her fingers against my palm.

"Mom." She responded, shaking a little as my hand held a stronger grasp on hers.

Her mother stepped in, wrapping her hands around Vienna as her finger stopped in my palm, staying still as her mothers warmth consumed her.

She let go of my hand, wrapping it around her mom as she embraced her, a small smile falling on her lips. She looked relieved, happier than she had a couple minutes before.

There hug broke, Vienna speaking up after the small gesture of love.

"Mom, this is Jason. Jason this is-"

"Vienna, I know who he is, and I can't bare to watch you be with him." What. I've never even met this lady, the one woman I really needed a good impression with.

"What did I do?" I had to know, I just had to understand what I did to cause this.

"You hurt my daughter."

Shit. What did I do this time.

"Mom he didn't-" She got interrupted, pushing her words out.

"Sam told me anything, he isn't worth your time."

OF COURSE SHE DID.

"My god. Mom come on, let's talk. I'll explain everything." She grabbed her hand, pulling her inside.

"There's nothing to talk ab-"

"Shut up oh my god. Jason go in the other room." She did not just tell her mother to shut up, oh my god.

"Vienna Aurora Moon, don't you dare." She sounded mad. And suddenly I was in another room.

I could hear them through the door, their conversation starting from the beginning, the beginning of us.

I was never able to understand how much my words hurt Vienna until I knew what love was too. Until I understand how much those words coming from her would hurt me. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was, explain everything I've ever said to her, but I knew I couldn't.

"Mom, I love Jason, he loves me. Sam's just jealous, Sam doesn't understand why I love him because she doesn't know how to love, I barely even know how to love. That disappointed I've felt my whole life has led me here, led me to this very moment where I tell you how much I love this guy and how much he loves me. Mom I'm sorry, I can't pretend like him hurting me makes me hate him, but I love him."

I couldn't understand her until now. I didn't think Vienna could say something like that, love like that or even think like that. She was the person I wished I could spend every waking moment with her. I wish my life revolved entirely around her. She's the one I love most. She's the only one I could ever love.

"Veve, you have to understand, a man who's hurts you is not a man who loves you. You cant do something like this, you cannot stay with him. I wont allow it, I cant allow it. You will not, I swear on my soul, you won't stay with this man. Sam has known you since you were two, and I've known you since you were born, we would both know what's best for you."

Veve?

"Oh my god you haven't seen me in two years, I've changed, I've moved on. I'm a new person. I can make decisions for myself now."

"But you can't. That's why you're coming home."

Coming home? She cant, she cant leave me. I cant live without her. Viennas my second half, she will always be my second half. I cant do this.

-

a/n: this sucks lol i'm tired of writing