Diary of Secrets(BL)

Chapter 13

Jace's P.O.V
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

'Dear Diary,
I had my first kisses with my brothers and oh my lord, it was electrifying. I thought the whole firework mumbo jumbo was just a hopeless romantic's idea of the perfect kiss. I was wrong, the feeling of their lips against mine made me melt. I'd kiss all of them all day if I could. But anyway, I went on my first date with Damon yesterday and we had a blast. First we cuddled on the couch and watched movies and then we made lunch together, it was only pizza rolls and mac and cheese but it was still good and fun. We also went to Rocco's to rock climb which was great and then we came home. I got my first handjob. I was nervous at first, but boy does it feel better having someone else touch me. I mean obviously it would, not really having to do the work and to just sit there and enjoy the euphoric feeling. I wonder how my other dates will go. I am pretty excited to go on a date with all of them eventually. But I was serious when I said I wanted to take it slow. Granted, Sebastian was there during said handjob but still. I wasn't feeling overwhelmed by it, which is why I want to take it slow. Reality, it seems so overwhelming at the moment for all to be loving up on me at once.'

I finish up my entry for the day and sigh looking over at Dakota's bed. It's pathetic, but I hate not waking up to see his sleeping face. I will end up talking to him today about the whole diary situation. Which reminds me, I need a new hiding place. I tap my fingers to my chin then get up and climb down the ladder. I lift my mattress and tuck the book under it before letting it fall back into place. There, no one should find it now. I thought about disregarding the whole idea, but I find it soothing to write down my thoughts. I have someone to confide in but it's nice to be able just to say whatever at the moment I'm feeling it.

The bedroom door opened and Dakota appeared in the clothes he wore yesterday. Duh, cause he didn't come home last night. he just went to Corrine's. We made eye contact as he shut the door.

"Hey Jacey" he said quietly.

"Hey" I muttered back.

Silence.

Well, this isn't awkward at all...Note the sarcasm.

"Can we talk?" He finally says moving to sit on the edge of his bed.

"Sure" I took a seat at my desk chair and swiveled to face him.

He sighed, tapping his fingers on his thigh "I am sincerely sorry for reading your diary" he finally said while keeping our locked gaze.

"How did you find it?" I asked curiously.

"Corrine and I started a pillow fight and I used the pillow that had your diary in it...it hurt her arm so we inspected the pillowcase and voila"

"Why did you read?" I fired at him.

"Uhh..well actually, Corrine tried stopping me by knocking it out of my hands but then it fell open to the first page and when I went to grab it... I read the first couple lines and yeah..." he trailed off

"So you thought you'd continue reading it" I deadpanned.

He cringed "Yeah" he replied honestly, scratching the back of his neck.

I rolled my eyes "Why didn't YOU just tell me you saw it? Instead of telling Bash and Damon about it?" I questioned.

"Well Corrine said to-" I cut him off

"Wait Corrine knows what's in it too?!" I questioned incredulously.

"She was right there when I read it, I didn't let her read past the first page though" he tried to reason.

"What the fuck Dakota" my eyes were blazing with anger "So not only did you read it, but so did Corrine and then you tell the twins...do you want to go tell mom about it now too?!" I boomed at him, pulling at my hair.

"What? No, Jace, listen please?" he pleaded while I rubbed my face in irritation, pressing my palms into my eyes. I heard rustling and then felt a presence in front of me. "Please?" he asked quieter and I could tell he was in front of me now. I groaned, letting my arms fall to my sides and glaring at him.

"Please, enlighten me with your excuses" I said sarcastically.

"First of all, not excuses. Second of all, Corrine knew about the twins and I since I joined them so really it wasn't a big deal for her to know that you were in love with us too"

"It is a big deal to me....no one was supposed to know, Dakota...no one" I ended on a whisper, letting my eyes fall to my fingers that fiddled with the end of my shirt.

"I know and I'm sorry, truly.....but I love you Jace" He cupped my face with his hands, making my eyes meet his again "Way, way, way more than a brother should and finding out the fact that you felt the same about not only me but the twins as well, it overjoyed me. I'm sorry I found out in a way that makes you feel betrayed or violated, I wish I didn't but at the same time, it wouldn't have gave me the initiative to kiss you" I kept silent because I honestly didn't know what to say at the moment.

"In a way, I am happy you found out because we all know I would've just bottled this shit up forever and a day" I tried to joke "But what gets me mad the most is that you told the twins without owning up to it yourself, letting Bash tell me you read it...much less that Corrine read it too"

"Like I said, I didn't let Corrine read after the first page because of the dream you had on the second page" He mentioned which made me blush, thinking about the dream. "But I'm sorry for her as well too....As for the twins...I'm not gonna lie, that was for selfish reasons of I being super excited to tell them that you loved them too. You're right, I should've told you myself. I, truthfully, didn't know Sebastian was gonna say anything about it though" He finished biting his lip, his beautiful emerald eyes radiating with sadness.

"I...I forgive you, but no more reading through it, ever or I'll cut your balls off" I narrowed my eye with a smile on my face. His eyes were rid of sadness and a relieved smile appeared on his face.

"I promise, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" he dotted kisses all over my face with each sorry.

"Alright, alright enough" I laughed. He stopped and ran a hand through my hair.

"You know, I kept a couple things of what you said in there a secret" he mentioned and I quirked an eyebrow "I didn't tell them about the dream or the toys..." He gave a wink "Only the fact of you being in love with us and that you caught us and was upset about it"

"I mean, I was only partially upset but otherwise it was hot" I admitted with my face burning.

"You're too cute when you blush" he said as he grabbed my chin and brushed his thumb against my bottom lip. Ugh, I want to kiss him so bad. I licked my lip slowly, brushing it against the tip of his thumb. He looked at my lips briefly before standing up and going over to his dresser to rummage through his clothes. What the fuck was that? He lifted his shirt off of his body and threw it in his dirty laundry bin before grabbing some clothes and turned to go into the bathroom.

I wanted a kiss, so I'm gonna get a kiss. "Dakota" I said to catch his attention, he paused and turned to me. I stood up from my desk chair quickly and basically ran, jumping on him and crashing my lips to his. I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist and he quickly dropped his clothes, supporting my ass as we moved our lips together in an explosive kiss. He walked forward and I moaned as my back hit the bathroom door. My hands went up to his hair, my fingers threaded through the softness. I ran my tongue across his bottom lip and he seemed surprised but opened, letting me in before his tongue started to battle with mine. He squeezed my ass with both of his hands and grinded his hips into mine, a moan bubbled out making my lips vibrate against his. We broke apart for air but then he trailed kisses from the corner of my mouth down my jawline and to my neck. I leaned my head to the side to give him better access, he found my sweet spot and began sucking and nibbling.

"Kota" I moaned, grinding myself against him. After a long hard suck, surely leaving a mark, he kissed up to my ear.

"As much as I'd love to continue Jacey baby, I have to shower because I feel dirty" he kissed behind my ear before nuzzling into my neck.

"You're dirty all the time" I said suggestively. He chuckled letting my feet find the floor, but leaving his hands on my ass. I wrapped my arms around him, sighing in content.

"I love you Jace" He whispered to me.

"I love you too Dakota" I whispered back, he pulled back giving me a chaste kiss on my lips before giving me an eskimo kiss. He bent down grabbing his clothes and I pinched his ass. He yelped and I giggled, stepping out of his way so he can get into the bathroom. He closed the door after he entered and I felt like a girl, sighing against the door with a smile on my face. I exited our room and skipped down the stairs happily down into the kitchen. Damon was bustling around, grabbing a coffee thermos, looking like a chicken with his head cut off.

"Running late?" I asked with an eyebrow raised

"Yes" he said exasperated, pouring the freshly made coffee into the thermos. He quickly screwed the top on and made his way over to me. "I gotta go, I love you" he said giving me a quick peck on the lips.

"I love you too, Have a good day!" I called out to his retreating form before I heard the front door open and close. I whistled as I got some bread and put it in the toaster. I scrolled through my phone while I waited for the toaster to pop. Matt asked to hang out this weekend with him and Amber, so I sent a quick 'yea' when Sebastian entered the kitchen.

"I assume the talk went well?" He asked while grabbing a bowl for cereal.

"Yeah, I told him if he ever read my shit again, I'd cut his balls off" I said nonchalantly, Sebastian laughed and then my toast popped up. I spread the creamy peanut butter I got out on to both slices.

"So what're the plans today?" he asked while grabbing the milk out form the fridge. I picked up one of my toasts and bit into it.

"Hmmmm" I hummed out before swallowing "I was thinking we could go to the zoo, if you're cool with that?"

"Sure!" He exclaimed happily, pouring milk into his cinnamon toast crunch. Sebastian and I have a love for animals, so I thought a zoo date would be perfect for us. Just then, Dakota came in the kitchen with damp hair but fresh new clothes.

"Corrine is coming over so we can work on our Calculus" He said going to the freezer, grabbing out toaster strudel.

"Okay, Jace and I are going to the zoo today, is she staying for dinner?" Sebastian asked, scooping up some cereal and bringing it to his mouth.

"Nah, she has to watch Bella when her mom goes to work" He replied putting his toaster strudel into the toaster.

"Alright, on our way back, we will stop at the grocery store to make something for dinner then" Sebastian commented back. I finished up my peanut butter toasts and poured a glass of milk before chugging it down.

"Ahh" I said and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand "Ready when you are, Bash" He scooped his last pieces before he downed the milk.

"Let's go" He smiled. We both gave Dakota a kiss before we said goodbye, then we were out the door. Yay, zoo!