i miss you, im sorry || rini au

ch. 20

ricky's pov

"i wonder what north high is like" carlos thought aloud.

"i heard they have a professional dance studio," big red said.

"they have a dance studio?! that's my dream" gina sighed dreamily.

"i'm sure they'll be super sweet and supportive," nini cut in.

"pfft yeah right," i muttered.

"what was that babe?"

shit. maybe i wasn't quiet enough

i shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly "oh um i was just thinking that maybe we shouldn't assume anything. they could be sweet but you don't know them."

"'you don't know them'? you mean we don't know them," kourtney said, staring me down

"um yeah that's what i meant."

"sure you did. anyways, we should plan our outfits. we need to look confident, yet kind. intimidating, but we aren't complete bitches," carlos said.

"my mum says i can't buy any new clothes until i outgrow my ones i have right now. and i have to help out with the farm this weekend so i can't come shopping," seb reminded him.

"oh sebby that's fine, we won't need to go shopping. just pick from what you have. it's more sustainable anyways," nini assured him.

"typical nini. always thinking about being good for the planet," kourt said jokingly.

i pulled nini closer to my side and kissed her head. who knows if she'll let me do this after we get to north high.

"yeah, well i liked having a girlfriend who cares about the world we live in."

everybody started laughing awkwardly. what did i say? all i said was i like having a girlfriend who cares. is that wrong?

"liked? we're still dating ricky," neens pointed out.

"oh sorry that wasn't on purpose. i wasn't thinking right."

"typical richard. coasts through everything," carlos said.

everyone moved on, going back to talking about the competition, but nini wont stop looking at me. she looks hurt. but why would she be hurt? i don't think i've done anything particularly wrong in the past 24 hours. i'm just nervous about possibly seeing lily again. i haven't talked to her since last summer and i have no idea where we stand. she's definitely seen my instagram posts about nini and i. the question is was she actually happy for nini and i when we got back together, or was she faking it?

in case you haven't caught on, she's one of the girls i hung out with last summer. i did mention neens a couple times, but in retrospect it wasn't as much as i probably should have. we did kiss. but it doesn't technically count as cheating since we were on a break. i didn't go off and date her, just messed around a little bit. i purposely didn't tell nini cuz i didn't wanna hurt her, and now she could find out. considering how fucking upset i was at nini going off to date E.J i don't think she's gonna be thrilled if she found out.

...

back at nini's house. ricky and nini are cuddling on the couch

nini's pov

something's off with ricky and i can't work out what it is. sometimes our relationship just feels like we're taking one step forward and three steps back. i mean did i do something wrong? all i've done is love him with everything i am, but he doesn't seem to feel the same. he's told me he loves me, but what if he changed his mind? i know people can fall out of love with people. he fell out of love with gina. how long will it be before he falls out of love with me?

"ricky can we talk about something?"

"of course. what's up?"

"it's just you've been acting a little weird recently. like at denny's today you made that comment about how you liked me. do you not love me anymore?"

"nini i-"

"cus if you have i want to know now before i get even more heart broken."

"nini, of course i still love you. i'm just nervous to possibly see someone when we go to north high."

"who?"

"that's not for you to worry about. trust me, everything is fine. she probably won't be there anyway."

"she?"

"um yeah."

"who is she?"

"nini it really doesn't matter-"

"of course it matters. ricky i want you to be honest with me. how do we expect our relationship to stay alive if you can't be honest with me?!"

"i am honest! this is just one thing! you're being paranoid."

"so you promise there is nothing between you and this girl?

"i promise," he sighed.

"i hope i'm not wrong in believing you."

"you're not. i love you and only you. i will never develop feelings for any other girl."

...

ricky's pov

yeh this is gonna be hard

...

a/n:

i think u know where i'm going with this lol