winter nightmare

-146-

-jay pov-

"akala ko hindi ka aalis today?" ibinaba ko 'yung paper bag na may laman na lunch ni tangi ko at saka ko sya niharap.

"mabilis lang to tangi, don't worry" i saw how she pouted.

"no, it's okay naman.. baka kasi pagod ka na dahil ang dami mong lakad these past few days" napatawa ako sa reaksyon n'ya.

"i'm not tired, don't worry too much.. i will see you later" i gave her a small hug before i waved her my goodbye.

nagdrive agad ako papunta sa café na sinabi sa akin ni kei. i saw him immediately when i entered the café.

"i'm sorry, traffic" maiksing saad ko sa kanya bago ako naupo.

"hindi na din ako magtatagal jay, seryoso ka na ba kay antonia?" napakunot ang noo ko sa tanong nya.

hindi man lang pinaorder, may pambili naman ako.

"i am ready to risks everything for her, mukhang hindi pa ba seryoso 'yun?"

"i still like her jay, i love her"

"how? how do you love her kei? by giving her pain? by not letting her live with peace? by turning your back on her? kung ganoon pala ang pagmamahal mo sa kanya, sorry na lang kei but i can love her better than you..."

"at binigyan mo ako ng rason para mas mahalin sya, mas hindi sya hayaan na mapunta sa mga tao na katulad mo" napaiwas sya ng tingin sa akin.

"yeah you're right" ay buti naman aware ka. tama talaga ako.

"what do you want ba? sasabihin mo ba sa akin na layuan ko sya tapos bibigyan mo ako nang 1 million? no thanks kasi meron ako nun" napakunot ang noo nya sa sinabi ko. grabe naman, wala ba 'tong sense of humor?

"what are you saying? i am here to help"

"for what?"

"now that you know that i still love her.. and she's my best friend..."

"what?"

"about the promise that i keep with her..." he got a brown envelope from the chair beside him and pushed it towards my direction.

"what is this?" i opened the envelope.

"my father's statement about her parents death. i also wrote her a letter,  'yung mga death threats na pinadala ni mommy, andyan din 'yung evidences. lahat na" isa-isa kong binuklat ang mga papeles. shit.

"seryoso ka ba dito?" i looked at him and he nodded.

"i feel sorry for being coward years ago, but she's right... letting each other go will be the easiest way for us to heal. aalis ulit ako, i am leaving for good, but before that.. i fixed everything first"

"thank you" 'yun na lang ang nasabi ko sa kanya. he did just nodded and stood up.

"wait kei, where are you going?"

"aalis na, gusto ko lang talaga ibigay sayo yan"

"are you not going to say goodbye to her?" pagpigil ko ulit sa kanya. knowing toni, kahit papaano.. may puwang pa din naman si kei sa kanya.

"for what? kaya nga sayo ko binigay yan. i don't have any courage na makita sya"

"i understand. but-- it will be nice if you at least keep her aware?"

"i have letter inside for her and for grandma. just please send it to them" mukhang wala naman na akong magagawa sa kanya.

"thank you jay" that was his last words before getting out the café.

i stayed there for a while thinking... should i let toni say good bye at him personally? hindi ba dapat maayos din nila 'yung kung ano man ang meron sila? hindi man katulad dati, but forgiveness. forgiveness will always be the key.

"tangi~"

"oh, nandito ka na agad?" i smiled on her and gave her a hug. "oh, what's wrong?" nagulat ata sya sa ginawa ko kaya agad akong lumayo

"i have good news" nangunot ang noo nya.

"huh? what?" i showed her the envelope and she immediately read it.

"who gave you these?" i pursed my lips. should i tell her?

"si kei?" i nodded when she immediately guessed it right.

"where is he?"

"he leave you a letter pati din kay lola" i saw how her tears fell. lumapit ako sa kanya at saka ko sya niyakap.

"nagsisimula pa lang tayo, tangi. i love you"